In March, I was mainlining Dwarf Fortress alternately with Warcraft III - sometimes in the same day - which led to this dream of Dwarf Fortress with Blizzard 3D graphics.
Raise the alarm! My thriving dwarf city is suddenly beset by behemoths!
Tawny ochre-stone-coloured monsters like WCIII's faceless Elementals were arising from the river, golems twenty feet high, stomping the first wave of axe-wielding dwarf defenders flat into cartoon corpses. Pandemonium. As they proceeded northwards into the city, then westwards to the plaza, I kept hitting the spacebar to pause - which worked, but then the game would start again on its own, and I swear I even saw "click to pause" taunt me and fade again - giving me no time to think or cope with the threat. It was my darkest moment as a leader.
Then heavy .50 cal machine gun fire thudded across the plaza. The corner towers chimed in with the chainsaw-ripping sound of the .30 cals. Much to my relief, some of the marksdwarves in the gatehouse had gotten a clear line of fire when the crowd parted in panic. Streams of hot lead and tracers ensnared three earth elementals crossing the plaza, who staggered under the onslaught, and fell.
Triumphant, I looked for the remaining behemoths but they were already gone. Most dwarves had made it to the safety of buildings or narrow mining tunnels.
"Thank goodness I bought those machine guns from the elves," I said.