WARNING! SPOILERS AHEAD! WHY DO WE SCREAM AT EACH OTHER? THIS IS WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE WHEN DOVES CRY!
Title: The Destroyers, Part II
Release Date: August 2002
Writer: Joe KellyPenciller: Doug MahnkeInker: Tom NguyenJLA Members: Superman,
Batman,
Wonder Woman,
Green Lantern,
the Flash,
the Martian Manhunter, and
Plastic Man.
Bad Guys: Tezumak and the
Shaman.
So what happens?It appears we need to do some
backstory first. A while back, when
Aquaman died or disappeared (it looked to me like he died, but everyone keeps saying he just
disappeared, so I guess he's coming back), two other strange things happened: the entire city of
Atlantis disappeared, and a strange
trench appeared in the
Atlantic Ocean, looking like
Moses started to part the sea, then left it while he went to get a
root beer. Partly as
tribute to Aquaman and partly to warn ships away from the trench, a gigantic semi-material
statue of Aquaman has been put in place next to the trench. Yes, it's an utterly stupid idea, but it looks like it'll figure into the story soon.
Anyway, the Weird Aztek Armor Guy (that's Tezumak) and the Weird Death Shaman Guy (that's the Shaman) have laid the
smackdown on the Justice League members in
Orlando, Florida, and they're planning on sacrificing Wonder Woman in some weird "
Let's Kill the Girl!" rite. Luckily, however, Green Lantern recovers from the coma he got poisoned into last issue just in time to get everyone back on their feet. Flash evacuates an
amusement park to save everyone from Tezumak's
bombs while Wonder Woman and J'onn J'onnz kick the Shaman's ass, and Batman and Plastic Man knock out Tezumak.
The
crisis is hardly over yet. Green Lantern still wants to know why the Shaman's magical
ravens are showing up in his
dreams, and Batman wants to know how Tezumak is able to use all this fancy
technology when it appears they journeyed here from thousands of years in the past. In the short period that the Leaguers are able to
interrogate the Shaman, they learn that he and Tezumak believe that the only way they can save their world (whether in the past or in the future, no one ever says) is to kill the
Seven-Headed Hydra, which is what they call the JLA. Unfortunately, the Shaman and Tezumak are able to
magic themselves away, and they head for the
Atlantic Trench. The JLA tries to catch up, but the Shaman activates some nasty
spell. Suddenly, the bad guys have vanished, possibly returned to their own time, the Atlantic Trench has collapsed, and Atlantis has returned -- above the water, wrecked and in ruins...
Cool Moments!The villains are
gross: the Shaman
vomits
black slime into Green Lantern's face, and Tezumak has nailed a
gold plate over his own mouth so he can never speak.
Cool Quotes!Batman: "Will you be confessing while you still have the capacity to eat
solid food or not?"
Plastic Man, still pissed about the Shaman stuffing ravens down his throat last issue: "I don't wanna fight the Aztec guy -- I want a piece of the
Indiannnn!! He put
birds in my mouth!"Plastic Man to Batman: "Wow. You know, some may say
you have the social skills of a rhino with gout -- but you do make with the brains from time to time!"
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