Findings:

• He had a prison of brass built in the hole, and then, when it was finished, he locked up his daughter
• I married him because he was not mean
• "I see," said the blind man to his deaf wife as he picked up his hammer and saw
• Donald Duck was banned in Finland because he doesn't wear pants
• because his heart was heavy, closing, like a tired eyelid
• It's easier to kick a praying man, because he's on his knees already
• As I looked back, he was reveling in his own feces
• All the while he was talking she was thinking what his whiskers would feel like on the back of her neck
• I'm the only person who'd ever told him to his face he was beautiful.
• When he was little, he laughed in his sleep.
• He stretched out his arms but she was not there
• When he was five, his father made him murder his imaginary friend.
• Shaymus is older than I thought he was
• A Conversation Between Danton, Robespierre, Napoléon, Chabert, and his wife
• All he left her was alone
• So I was balls deep in the guy's ass that night when he turns to me and asks for a kiss. Damn. What a fag.
• mr. T pities the fool regardless of whether he is wearing his seatbelt
• How many times has God twiddled his thumbs before he put vertebrates on the Earth?
• His collection of substances that should not exist was stolen. The thieves then killed themselves 1000 times over.
• My man was shot for his sheep coat
• I saved his life. He does not know it.
• He Was a Crook
• He Died with a Felafel in His Hand
• The girl didn't know if she was loved until he said yes.
• When I was 21, he was building a Time Machine
• In a quiet grove of pines under a frosty sky, he helped her out of the sack. She wore severe white hospital pajamas and was beautiful.
• Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
• Ani and his wife Tutu play senet in the Other World
• In the end, he could quiet his mind only by dying
• "He was a terrible man," she sobbed, between bites of alimony
• He dreamt he was a bulldozer, she dreamt she was alone in an empty bed
• Meanwhile, the PILOT, who has been laughing hysterically through the entire sequence, finally loses it. He falls out of his chair and bangs his head against the panel, causing the ship to lose control and crash into a nearby planet
• why is the great man great? he keeps on running through a world of his own.
• Tom, He was a Piper's Son
• Then again, maybe he was recruiting for a cult
• He was born with the gift of logic but the inability to use it
• He Would Close His Eyes, and the World Would Burn.
• And then night was here, after a day of measured breathing, and I could forget about breathing because the waiting was done
• Jesus said, "I love him, for he is my brother." He was talking about everyone.
• He began to learn that waste flows downstream. Imagine his surprise.
• His memory perishes from the earth, and he has no name in the street.
• As the band laughed, her finger traced his spine, and he folded into her
• And when she came back she was nobody's wife
• The Nice Painter and his Wife
• I was floating in the ocean of his eyes.
• The Revolution was Postponed Because of Rain
• She was a committed romantic and an anarcha-feminist. This was hard for her because it meant she couldn't blow up beautiful buildings.
• The Biologist's Valediction to His Wife
• The time a thug punched my friend in the face because he could
• It was late when he came home; it woke you up
• He will have the taste of warm ripe fruit in his mouth
• He flops over and bonks his head
• I knew enough about him to know his name and what kind of snowball he could make
• He weaves his words
• He's a feminist. He tells that to all his mistresses.
• Her innocence fell. She kicked at it some, frowned, and left it there because it was beautiful.
• He who does not forget his first love will not recognize his last
• It was 1992. He smiled.
• The Abridged Edition: She was to one side, he was to the other, an untested bridge between them
• She grew a little older, while he was telling her
• I don't know where he gets his words but I like them
• He throws his heart down like a gauntlet
• The class valedictorian was still tripping balls when he was bailed out in time to give the commencement speech at graduation
• God Made Man Because He Loves Stories
• He was an ant on an ill-defined mission. She was the trapdoor spider of love.
• That's Just How He Was
• He was hard in all the wrong places
• some say he was never here at all
• He Was Only Joking
• The Cook, The Thief, His Wife and Her Lover
• he was alive, and some of the other people, they were carbon copies
• He made a way to his anger
• She didn't write like Emily Dickinson, but she did live in a house overlooking a cemetery, and I guess he thought that was important.
• he listened so well, he was still curious.
• To me he is a daisy and I keep trying to count his petals
• unfortunately, his entire corpus was composed in English, and so has been lost to the ravages of time
• His version was better
• His love was enormous; it cleared rooms that desperately wanted to be full.
• Because he feared the turn of seasons
• No one learned anything, because there was nothing to learn.
• Johnny Clueless was there, with his Simulated Wood-Grain
• It Was a Lover and His Lass
• I don't know what he was listening for, but he wasn't listening
• Oedipus-Schmedipus, as long as he loves his mother
• Because, perhaps she was cold
• I'm not HIS sister; he's MY brother
• (because this was always subconsciously the inspiration, even if I did not know it at the time, and I only realised it just now)
• The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist
• He Had Not Where To Lay His Head
• just because it was an accident doesn't mean it'll come back to life
• Mr. Lunch liked to chase birds. In fact, he was a professional.
• At least he was gentle
• More than he was willing to give
• How the Old Woman Took Care Of Candide, and How He Found the Object of His Love
• An ocean away and here he was, seeping into her
• He was confirming to himself that they were laughing with him after all
• Of King Sigmund's last battle, and of how he must yield up his sword again
• He wasn't programmed to be a tenor, he was programmed to be a physician!
• He lived in southern California with his tanned, powdered mother
• She doesn't know what he sees, but sometimes it makes his face beautiful
• He is honest and forthright with strangers. He reserves his lies for his family
• Wheresoever he went, there was Eden
• If a frog had wings, he wouldn't kick his tail when he jumped
• He was the kind of man who shacked up for shelter
• He found a liquid cure for his landlocked blues
• He thinks a path and travels the emptiness that was there
• How Candide Was Brought Up in a Magnificent Castle and How He Was Driven Thence
• He made me promise I would do this when I was next sad. So I promised myself I would not be sad again.
• He was like the bottle of Champagne Krug
• The Trial: Andrew Johnson was not guilty of the crimes for which he was impeached.
• He wakes up everyday, puts an empty gun in his mouth, and pulls the trigger.
• The Marlboro Man died of cancer, but he wasn't a rocket scientist when he was healthy, ha ha ha.
• He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
• So he's dressed a little differently and he has a halo-like light above his head.
• Amakuni once drew an old sword of his from a box, suddenly overjoyed by something he had cast aside.
• She was coming out as he was going in.
• I kicked the Martian in his otherworldly balls, and he screamed like the solar wind howling through a planetary magnetosphere
• judge a captain not by his shipwrecks, but by whether or not he blames the sea
• He tells me that I could have his heart and I want to take it right then, slip it into my pocket and run
• He was found
• I should ask my barber where he gets his hair cut, then go there and slowly make my way up the chain
• Once there was a bug in a hole that he dug
• He was a man stuck between the objective and the subjective
• He just left his body
• he is too shy to write his tale
• I thought he was a man but he was just a little boy
• The Man and His Wife
• He was there, and then he wasn't, and with him went those memories
• making certain he was touching her
• he was a punk poet himself
• She had become a mutton for punishment and he was a wolf
• He's dead, Jim. You grab his wallet, I'll grab his tricorder.
• Mr. Mahoney and His Christian Wife
• but you had his eyes and that was sort of almost enough
• The Huntsman's Letter To His Wife
• His ex-wife was so frigid, her clitoris was only the tip of the iceberg.
• The Man who Mistook His Wife for a Hat
• The cult leader poured himself a drink and started on about his plans, and I wondered how the priest was getting on
• Did Nixon beat his wife?
• The Fisherman and His Wife
• Because he's the hero Gotham deserves
• Don't Sit Next to Me Just Because I'm Asian
• Because I dig you
• Just because you both have the same problem does not mean you are one another's solution
• I care because you do
• I lost a chance at $40,000 because my mommy wouldn't let me sell my stock
• Just because Linux is Free doesn't mean Linux Software has to be Free
• Because that would make sense
• Don't assume that just because I'm gay, all I want is sex
• If my mom doesn't let me play the violin because it's gay then ...
• I Like Bananas Because They've Got No Bones
• I'm a cynical bastard because I care so much, dammit
• because it wasn't just the air
• No one asks me if I'm a Satanist or anything because I take the precaution of wearing a predominantly flannel and hawaiian shirt-oriented wardrobe
• because I love skating bears
• I Had No Time to Hate, Because
• Because the suburbs lacked the proper elevation
• Because I love you
• Good Husband and Wife Day
• Because, you think, Maybe They Are Delicious.
• It’s not because of your unconventional ideas about sex. It’s because you’re fat.
• Because the gods that made them are gods no more
• I don't shiver because I'm cold. I shiver because you are.
• Because, not in spite of
• Let's hear that string part again, because I don't think they heard it
• Up, because the sky has room for us and more than we can ever make
• I refuse to panic just because she's happy.
• Because I lived in Paradise
• You cherish this box because it once held your dreams
• just because you've forgotten doesn't mean that you're forgiven
• I ran from Iran because I slam Islam
• I say yes, because I believe in sailboats
• or because we are all Supermen living in the city of the future
• We love foxes because we killed the wolves
• We do what we do because of who we are. If we did otherwise, we would not be ourselves.
• Just because she's nice to you doesn't mean she wants to fuck you
• When the seagulls follow the trawler, it is because they think sardines will be thrown into the sea.
• If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
• Ignoring a leak because it's on the other side of the boat
• Just because I'm nice to her doesn't mean I want to fuck her

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