The Irish language is written with only the letters abcdefghilmnoprstu. This alphabet can also be used to write English using a bastard lipogrammatic spelling created with a few simple substitutions:

  • ay => ae
  • ck => ch
  • ey => ie
  • ke => che
  • ki => chi
  • qe => che
  • qi => chi
  • ye => ie
  • j => i
  • k => c
  • q => c
  • v => u
  • w => u
  • x => gh
  • y => ie
  • z => s

<samp>
It reallie isn't all that much harder to read; ieou're reading it right nou. Most of the omitted letters are the least used letters in English aniewae. I'll admit the result does looc a bit cute and Irish, but that iust means it's that much easier to get luckie.

Sample (from Pinocchio ch 04):

Uerie little time did it tache to get poor old Geppetto to prison. In the meantime that rascal, Pinocchio, free nou from the clutches of the cop, uas running uildlie across fields and meadous, taching one short cut after another touard home. In his uild flight, he leaped ouer brambles and bushes, and across broocs and ponds, as if he uere a goat or a hare chased bie hounds.

To complete the effect, use a Celtic-stiele font and set eueriething to louercase.

</samp>

This alphabet can also be used to write C code, provided a header similar to this is used:
/* This file translates C language keywords and select function and
 * macro names from 18 letter to 26 letter alphabet so gcc can work.
 * Change this file to add more translations.
 */
#define uhile while
#define suitch switch
#define breac break
#define tolouer tolower
#define siseof sizeof

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