• I would've taken an axe to it, but I'm pretty sure the dryad would have pulverized me
• They blew up the world, but what really pisses me off
• He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
• You're not laughing now, but I'm voting this sucka up
• They call me Engineer-khan
• You're voting this sucka down now, but I'm going to laugh
• Call me back when hair starts growing on his palms
• Telephone solicitors now call me at their own risk
• They wrote it all in perl but it was mostly system calls
• Now that sex is a marketing strategy, I'm not sure I enjoy it anymore
• I'm gay, but I'm not sure it's genetic
• They Call Me MISTER Tibbs!
• Do you love me now, Daddy? Do you think I'm pretty?
• Maybe I'm naive but this type of website bugs me
• I am no doubt moving. The question now is not where, but how. My life changes everyday. Big deal.
• They do not know how immortal, but I know
• They hate me because I'm beautiful
• You're laughing now, but I'm voting this sucka down
• Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
• Oh, no. Look, you've gone and made me optimistic. I was before, but now it is showing.
• Our obsessions almost killed me, but now here we are, talking like normal human beings
• I was discovered by scientists, what will they call me?
• I'm changing the climate! Ask me how
• They know me not by name, but numbers
• The bastards got me but they won't get everybody
• All right, I'm God now. How do I get out of this mess?
• I'm not sure I know how to neuter your cat
• I was once smaller than a jellybean, but now look at me - I am macroscopic!
• And then they came for me, but the bridge would not ignite.
• I used to love women from afar. Of course, now they call it stalking.
• I hope they kill me while I'm standing here, so I can die happy.
• DPI, resolution, physical printing size - how they interrelate
• How television car chases influenced me
• Whoever You Are Holding Me Now in Hand
• Starting a traffic jam
• How Lars Ulrich made me quit my job at a movie theater
• I'm not anorexic, but I'm working on it
• How now, brown cow?
• Don't call me Debbie
• The Five Little Peppers and How They Grew
• I'm so shallow, a new t-shirt makes me happy
• Hear me now
• You can learn a lot about a person by how they act at an Airport
• Something everyone has done but nobody knows what to call it
• But, my dear sir, if you educate them, they will no longer be Baptists
• Questions you never asked, but now that I mention it, yeah, that's a good point
• Once upon a time there was an ocean but now there is a mountain range.
• How to start a gaming group
• You'll never know how much you've changed me
• Once and somewhere far away I might have found peace, but now I can't live without this city.
• Tell me what I'm supposed to be feeling
• Now I'm Nothing
• Get Me Away from Here, I'm Dying
• I'm Just Me (user)
• Things that no one told you...until now, because I'm telling you. Consider yourself fortunate
• if i'm right, you'll be here to read this any day now
• think of me now
• They don't touch me the same way
• There's someone in my head but it's not me
• Prilosec
• kill him dead; don't call me
• call me hiroshima
• Don't miss me until I'm dead
• How long do you think I'll let you keep me here?
• Not now, Ma! I'm busy noding! (e2poll)
• How to Stop Worrying and Start Living
• Now open your eyes and tell me what you saw
• Show your work, or, how my math abilities started to decline
• Cool! Now hand me the sandwich Luke.
• I'm not going to fire a 2 million dollar missile at a 10 dollar empty tent and hit a camel in the butt
• It did not get nicer, but it sure got a hell of a lot more honest
• I'm at the station, but I can't get on the train
• It's not happening here, but it is happening now.
• but you should be right here, right next to me
• How I started smoking
• Don't call me "Caucasian." I am a Caucasian-American.
• Please, Call me Honky
• Don't Sit Next to Me, Just Because I'm Gay
• this writeup made me hungry like DAMN so I'm chinging it!
• me, now and again
• I'm tone-deaf, but it's okay
• I'm not homophobic but...
• I'm so goddamned cruel to you. But you'll never know
• They are all pretty but fading.
• The Powers of the Gods, and how they might constructively be used.
• I'm a Chicken-Hawk, and I'm gonna eat me some chickens
• Don't blame me, I'm from Massachusetts
• My mother also taught me how to quickly kill and clean game
• They need food AND water? You didn't tell me about the water part.
• DJuxtaposition vs. Gamestop : Or how I learned to let go of the PS2 and start loving the DC
• As of now you are no longer able to openly disagree with me
• How can I talk about love when the bacon is burned and the house is an absolute mess and the children are screaming their heads off and I'm going to miss my bus?
• I'm a consumer whore... And how!
• I'm sorry, but we can't watch the rest of MacBeth until it is censored
• But beauteous fields lie just before me
• Projects that use C techniques and call it C++ make me ill
• Correct me if I'm wrong, and if I am, I'll eat a bug
• They had been expecting me
• Dude, check me out. I'm like a little otter, a sexy little otter!
• The sheer fact that I'm in a developing country should make me a better person, yes?
• SunOS, Solaris and how they relate
• Read Me First: Getting Started on Everything2
• tied up now fuck me (user)
• How to be a moron in any city but Baltimore
• I am in love with so much more than your body heat, but let's start there
• Mr. Potato Head Sprouted. He got moldy. Now he's all dried up, but he's still up in the cabinet.
• She might not need me. But then again she might.
• Call her up, tell her how love is not a question.
• Tell me how you want to die, and I'll tell you who you are
• I asked a friend to draw me, and I'm scared of what I'll see
• I don't have any secrets. Now ask me if I have any lies.
• You nature lover / you country punk / you bowl me over / I'm not that drunk
• They are telling me it is time to go
• I'm up, he sees me, I'm down
• Simple words, simple dreams
• I know they are watching me
• how do they feel, those unblinking eyes?
• it's not what you node, but how you node
• You may think I'm lying, but it's true
• You know to me she's but a fetish
• You say you love; but with a voice
• They don't realize they're talking about death but I can hear it behind their voices
• I Think I'm a Pervert, But I'm Totally Over It
• So that's what they call it nowadays?
• Fuck me if I'm wrong
• let me know who you are now.
• How to jump start a car
• Take a day, plant some trees, may they shade you from me
• And They Believed Me!
• That's a valid point, but right now we're focusing on...
• Stand up for yourself, OR: How I got the shit kicked out of me
• Call me a berry-picking, pony-touching star-marveler
• Some people call me a drama queen
• The cult leader poured himself a drink and started on about his plans, and I wondered how the priest was getting on
• They Know Me
• How They Came to Bunbury
• Stop killing me now
• How to develop one side of your butt and still have the other one flabby
• he touched me then, but I forgot to feel
• I would have tried, but Charlotte kept Charlotte in the world of Charlotte and she barely heard me
• man when you are telling me how it was
• Don't hate me because I'm evil
• Kiss Me, I'm Chris
• I'm Stupider Now: My Life at the Craps Table
• Black People Hate Me and They Hate My Glasses
• How They Drank at the Forbidden Fountain
• Keeping beer cold in the Old West
• But what are they really thinking?
• How The Original Pancake House nearly killed me
• How They Brought the Good News from Ghent to Aix
• The FOOLS! They laughed at my theories at the university, but I'll have my revenge! I'll have my REVENGE!
• How Soon is Now?
• It wasn't so much a trip down memory lane as it was me carjacking someone's memorymobile and speeding off down the freeway, but I digress.
• Don't call me Asian
• Oh!, how you inflict me with wounds of paranoia and desire
• Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now
• Please say it's not too late now that I'm dead and gone
• I was wrong as a child, to think old people were stupid for asking me where the day had gone. Now I understand... we older people do not live.
• I gotta go right now. Someone is videotaping me in my spaceship.
• I see it on the TV and I laugh out loud, but it's the way I feel right now.
• The eyes of the dead may not blink, but they have been known to wander
• World, take care of me. You don't owe it to me, but I don't know any better.
• Windows XP won't start up - how to fix it
• Call me a lady and I will growl at you
• Take Off My Pants and Tell Me You Love Me and I'll Laugh in Your Face and Call You a Slut
• I'm so toasty, you could spread jam on me
• Oh be a fine girl kiss me right now sweetheart
• I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now
• How Prom nearly killed me
• How do we know dog biscuits are "now better tasting!"?
• I may not have had enough of me but I've had enough of you
• Being a dickhead
• My 486 almost runs Debian now, but I can't play Doom!
• Jessica, too tall but still lovely, was not sure she would or should drop the whale
• Looking like a pirate is fun but only having one eye annoys me
• Things they don't teach you at law school but really ought to
• As Guan Yu would surrender to the Han, but not to Cao Cao, I will surrender to you, but not to your desire to control me.
• "Sex, as they harshly call it"

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