A couple of years ago, when I was living in Nevada, a friend of mine was getting the alcohol for my housewarming party, seeing as how he was the only one of legal age at the time. It would've been a great plan, had it not been conducted in a supermarket.

Oh, how I miss grocery stores with ginormous liquor selections.

So, anyway, as my friend was carting nearly two hundred dollars worth of alcohol around the store while getting chips and other party necessities, he was garnering some odd looks.

At one point in the checkout line he turned to some random disapproving pepperpot and screamed:

"All right! I have a fucking problem, okay?"

This is why it's best to shop for booze with people who don't take shit from no one.