I walked out on Nicole again tonight. I could hear her hating me down the stairs on the way out of our apartment well after I was gone. It sounded like it hurt a lot, but it was one of those nights when I just couldn't turn around. My plan had been to burn through the well-neglected points on my Amtrak membership and hop a train to a new town for a few days. I booked a seat in coach to Pittsburgh, fell asleep on the bench in the lobby, and missed the train. I walked back to the car and drove home.
The bathroom light was on when I got back. I could hear Nicole lapping her bath water. I took my shoes off, carefully snaked my way through the hall into our room, slithered under the sheets. I let the sound of her folding water keep me awake for hours. "Some days I am so in love with you," I sang softly to myself. I fell asleep eventually.
October/November, 2012