I’m in one of those moods again. I walk around my house, doing phony kung fu moves and talking to myself and asking questions. I’m fucked up. I have problems, you see. I’m neurotic as fuck and I’m depressed and I’m probably going to kill myself. Not true, another voice cuts in. You’ve got it easy, kid. Quit whining. You’re normal. Other people have problems. Not you. You’re normal. Well, comparatively. It’s like there are two me’s. I’m at war with myself, my head is divided, yin yang duality, always struggling and fighting.

No. Scratch that. Start from the beginning. Everything you just read is bullshit.

So, what do I know? What principles do I have? What axiom can I base my life on? Who am I? What is truth? What makes sense?

Cogito Ergo Sum. No, fuck that. Gimme a break, Descartes. I’m talking about me. About my life. Read some Kant and get over yourself. The shorter an aphorism is, the more false it is.

No. Scratch that. Start from the beginning. Everything you just read is bullshit.

Everyone has problems. They are equal. No. Everyone has problems. Some are bigger than others. No. No one has problems. No. No.

No. Scratch that. Start from the beginning. Everything you just read is bullshit.

So, what do I know? What principles do I have? What axiom can I base my life on? Who am I? What is truth? What makes sense?

This is what I know. There is life. That is all. That is everything. Life indivisible, life whole and pure and true which encompasses all other things. You cannot define it. I do not have problems. Other people do not have problems. I am not. Other people are not. We are not. It is.

Nihilism? Fuck that, too. I don’t believe in nothing. I believe in everything. Nihilism is wrong. Christianity is wrong. Atheism is wrong. Islam, Buddhism Taoism Confucianism Zen are wrong. Capitalism is wrong. Communism is wrong. Newton is wrong. Einstein is wrong. You are wrong and I am doubly so. We are looking at life from the wrong end of the telescope. Don’t try to turn it around, though. It will only make things worse. Just keep walking. Knowledge is wrong. Truth is wrong. Truth is the most wrong concept in the universe. Funny thing is, everything else is just as bad. If you were to line everything up on an untruth scale, they would all be at 10, and all the other numbers would fall off and trickle away. That scale is wrong.

No. Scratch that. Start from the beginning. Everything you just read is bullshit.

Boundaries are false. Definitions are false. Difference is false. You are not unique. You cannot be, you don’t even exist. Except, of course, that you do, in it. We all do, but nowhere else. You cannot take us out. If you try, you have a shadow, perception minus truth. For what it’s worth.

No. Scratch that. Start from the beginning. Everything you just read is bullshit.

Who am I? I am Buddha. I am The Pope. I am King Arthur. I am Jesus Christ, our Lord and Saviour. I am God I am the cypress tree in the emperor’s garden. I am a small tea cup. I am JessicaPierce’s hot ass. I am a Pseudo_God. It’s ok, though, so are you. Not that it matters – you are not reading this. I am a pretentious 16 year old boy sitting at his computer. I am the immortal Sage Lao Tzu sitting in a cave a thousand miles below the earth’s surface with the wizard Merlin, who I also am, coincidentally. I am you. I am blind, deaf, dumb, I can sense or perceive nothing; I am one with everything. I am enlightened.

No. Scratch that. Start from the beginning. Everything you just read is bullshit.

There is no enlightenment. There is no joy, sorrow, love, god, or hatred. There is just this, this one and single thing, which is not a thing at all, this one thing which is everything, this one thing which is not definable nor perceivable nor is it anything else. It just is.

No. Scratch that. Start from the beginning.

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