English pronunciations of 'ough'

You're not a moron, just speaking the wrong dialect. The British English pronunciation of borough and compounds using it like Scarborough in Yorkshire and Loughborough (roughly Luff'-bruh) have a schwa as their final syllable, quite distinct from the sound in dough, toe, sew, mow, Po ...*

The definitive list (southern British English):

1. Though - rhymes with so
2. Through - homophone with threw
3. Cough, Gough - rhyme with off
4. Tough, enough - rhyme with buff
5. Borough and its compounds, thorough - a short schwa
6. Hiccough - rhymes with up. I'd normally use the spelling "hiccup", though.
7. Bough - rhymes with cow (there exists also a surname pronounced as (3) above)
8. Ought, nought, fought, bought - rhyme with caught, taut, court, sort
9. Lough - homophone with loch

* left in to illustrate why response nodes are a Bad Thing when the node they respond to disappears. Watch and learn.

According to the pronunciation symbols used on www.m-w.com, the various pronunciations of ough (including some rarer ones) would be written:

1. of - cough
2. ü - through
3. au - bough
4. &f - enough
5. O - though
6. o - thought
7. & - Flamborough
8. &p - hiccough
9. äk or äk - lough
10. äf - Gough
11. ä - nought, ought