Dreaming of my high school class again, see Dream Log: September 3, 2000. This time I was visiting my old hometown and kept on bumping into them all the time. Everyone looked so old and weary, and I was so beautiful, young and successful.

I think it has to do with the big change coming up in my life this month. Most from my old high school class still live in our common hometown; only a few of us moved out of there. I left 10 years ago, and when I'm visiting it's like nothing ever changes. Same people doing same stuff. I feel bad for thinking of them - some of which are close friends - as losers in some way.

fragment 1

A young woman discovers a criminal conspiracy at a holiday lodge/hunting and fishing store. The conspirators are divided between killing her, and going away with what they have amassed.

fragment 2

A drama coach in with small trailer/office must deal with jealous students.

fragment 3

Drama coach must deal with student who has just returned from New York who has become sick from eating the food there. She can’t accept it.

fragment 4

Daniel and Lemper streets is the best location for a fight in the city. It is just secluded enough so that a fight can go on uninterrupted.

Something like the Pillsbury Bake-Off. There is a contest to develop a cookie recipe and then — the faces are all indistinct, or at least the people here are unfamiliar — someone invents a tongue-in-cheek "theme song" which they use mainly to annoy other people. The song seems familiar during the dream, but on awaking I cannot remember what the song is based on at all (I want to say Gilligan's Island but know that is some sort of semiconscious interpolation). I cannot recall it, even though I sense that I am one of those who picks up on the theme song and uses it to amuse myself and to annoy those among the contestants who are taking themselves a little too seriously.

At some point, after the bake-off is winding down, it seems, a caravan of cars assembles, leaving slowly from a large field that has served as parking lot and gathering place for the bake-off. (Don't ask me where the ovens were; most of the bake-off seems to have taken place in this large park or field of some sort. The feel is that of a big flea market or some sort of folk festival. Maybe we had taken over a state park?)

A car full of "theme song singers" is two cars ahead of mine. I am alone in my car, but can sense that the driver and passengers in the car between mine and the raucous singers is getting ready to retaliate, possibly with a song of their own, but the possibility of a violent outburst cannot be ruled out either.

As always, this feels like a fragment of something I am grasping to recall more fully.

On the way to the city there were two enormous beetles in my car. They sparkled with green and blue jewels. They could fly, but heavily. I shooed one out the right window and one out the left.

The jewelry store was closed but was still letting people in to see the largest diamond in the world. I read an informational brochure while waiting for the old woman to get tired of cooing over it. The boy was thoroughly bored and told me he was going to come back and steal all the jewels he could carry. There were no guards to stop him. By this time it was a lucid dream and I stepped very carefully up to the diamond's display case. It didn't look that big. The light was bad, so I walked around the case, tryng to catch a sparkle. Every time I walked around t, the diamond grew bigger, which I didn't realize until it was the size of a pumpkin, though still set in a silver ring. I still wasn't impressed until it began to glimmer from the inside out, and then I could see the millions of tiny silvery facets that someone had chipped and smoothed. I knew it had been done by hand, and I knew it had taken decades. By this time, I knew enough to be impressed with everything that happened.

My dream last night had me sitting around MSC (place at my college where people go to just hang out) with some of my friends. But most of these people are my old high school friends who don’t go to A&M. Someone them I haven’t seen in years. But in my dream it was as if we where all still real close. I didn’t have that feeling that those people didn’t belong there.

Somehow everything changed to getting ready for a football game. Like I use, I was putting on all the band (yes I was a band nerd) stuff. I got really worried because I realized I didn’t know the show. I didn’t know what I was suppose to be doing. I tired to get someone to tell me what I was suppose to do on the field, but no one would help. After stressing out over that I woke up.

I was sitting next to my mother. We were in front of a Venetian canal, the sun was setting, and the water reflected all the brilliant pinks and oranges of the sky. There was some sort of golden dust in the air, reminescent of lightning bugs, but better in a way. I remember thinking that this was one of the most beautiful things of my life, and this made me cry. I leaned my head on my mother's shoulder; "I have a question for you... it's hard to ask though..." She put her arm comfortingly around me. "You know you don't have to be scared of asking me anything," she said. I thought about this for awhile, as this really was a difficult question for me, and the thought of her actually giving me an answer scared me even more. "Mom.... what's it like being dead?" "It's different, honey. Just different." We sat awhile longer, staring out over the water, comforted with eachother's presence.

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