This is a rather long dream, and I'm actually shocked that I could remember most of it.. even if it took me a while:

I'm at this seminar for potential zoroastrians led by Nietzsche (who looks a lot like Mickey Rooney in Girl Crazy, with this meek boyish voice). I'm standing in a crowd of people, people I've never even really met but I know I've seen somewhere.. at some point in time. These people aren't zoroastrians! They're Anglo-Catholics!

There are two main rallies going on. One is led by Ormazd and the other by Ahriman (although on his poster, it was spelled incorrectly.. I don't remember how.. I don't even remember seeing the poster but I kept making a point about it.) And Ormazd had some philosophy that I guess I made up in my dream about these weird manifestations of embryotic deities (some sort of spinoff of his own philosophies, I suppose). In fact, most of the dream was just me thinking.. and it turned lucid at some point, but I don't remember how. Part of my dream from the night before came in and I was in some sort of Hell fighting Grendel from Beowulf until Hell froze over and it became an ice skating rink. It then looked like a really badly-produce Dr. Seuss cartoon with children skating around snowflakes (actually defineble shapes) falling from the sky.

I look over to a drop of something that looks like the extended mouth in Dodongo's Cavern in Zelda 64: Ocarina of Time. In fact, that's what the entire ambience of the rink is. But by the drop, I can see Ben standing with his hands tucked inside the sleeves of his jacket, shivering. I run over, but I'm actually sliding as I run, and I collapse into him. And on his face is the most macabre look I have ever seen, pale but shedding maybe an ounce of life in him by this painful expression that he just may break down in tears and I want to just hold him and tell him everything will be all right. He tells me he saw me at the seminar and tried to get my attention but I ignored him, and he had wanted me to be his partner in the games. I asked him what games he was talking about and he told me about something that was a lot like something from an Eastern European culture, but I don't remember anything about it because he spoke so fluidly.

We couldn't skate because we had broken bones from the fall and so we sat there talking about our opinions on the seminar and how much we hated the theatrical performances of Cat on a Hot Tin Roof and The Nerd, which was funny to me when I woke up because I've never seen either performed, much less know ANYTHING about them. I somehow made a connection between The Nerd and the Necromonicon, but Ben was really bent over on this, and tried to avoid it because he knew it was making me sound stupid, so he said something like, "Good ol' Tennessee Williams, you could just give him a hand job." That's when I think this dream became lucid. I start rambling on about how when I wake up, I'm going to have a nice big bowl of oatmeal and I'll be sure to put a soy burger in it for good tidings on his passage to his grandparents' house. Oh and then this gets really weird, something on television seeps into my dream, and I can hear Tina Turner singing "What's Love Got To Do With It" only I think the lyrics are "Hot Stuff ..something something something" And Ben laughs and I wake up

Home by 8:45, pj’s three minutes later, in bed just after that.
I fell.
Warm silent depths.
My flatmates came home somewhere after 11, I think.
Barely surfacing, I turned over, sank again.

There’s nothing like a long, restful night.
Nothing like waking without an alarm clock on Saturday morning.
Nothing quite like a weekend.

I had a long, involved dream last night wherein, among other things, kanon42 was exceedingly angry at me. I'd been out in a theme park all day, leaving her alone at home to fend for herself.

Now, kanon has this cute habit of standing endearingly pathetically in the pantry, pointing at (say) a box of spaghetti, muttering

"food. be food. why aren't you food? food food food. you should be food. be FOOD."

If she does this for long enough, I come along and boil water and set other appropriate actions in motion to, indeed, turn the box into food. In my dream, however, I didn't do this, as I was absent, and when I returned, she was quite mad.

When I woke up, she was gazing at me lovingly, yet all I could think of was how angry she'd been just seconds before, within the dream. I realized how silly this was -- but nonetheless, I was overcome with shame and guilt. She reassured me that all was well, to no avail... the feeling subsided, after a time, leaving me simply curious, wondering how a dream could have such a profound and lasting emotional effect.

This strange man kidnapped me and my mom and a bunch of other people and took as to some redneck country sight, and me and my mom escaped in Arkensa and ran to the airport and he cought up with us there and I attacted him and stabbed him to death. It was a really scary, odd dream, I never killed anyone in my dream before....

And my mom almost died too, cause he wouldn't give her he medicine and she is diabetic.

It was the scariest dream I had in a while, I realize it sounds dumb... But I woke up crying....

They all had heart-plugs and were very frightened. He went from person to person, first caressing them, then kissing them. I watched nervously as he reached the last person, a boy of maybe 16 years old who was crying. He caressed but didn't kiss him, instead he pulled the plug out with his teeth.

blood gushing from the boy's chest, somehow the plug was poking through the poor thing's blue shirt. "For you I'd bleed myself dry" was being sung from behind the velvet curtains as the boy implored me to stem the flow. But I didn't want to break from the crowd of people as the kisser and killer glared at me for being so afraid.

As he sank to the floor, he handed me a list of plants and pictures of cushions...

Well, It all started off when I was in a building with 4 corridors coming off the hall where I was standing in. The carpet was a light brown, and so were the walls. There were lots of people around and there were potted plants in the middle of the room next to some green plastic chairs. I was standing with my friends, Rishi, Steven and Vaughan.I first went off with Vaughan, We were walking around down the corridor, It was a university open day, All of the doors were steel and blue like a cell in a police station. We went into a room. Vaughan immediately started chatting to the girl who was in there. I was just sitting there looking at some things on the shelf. a blue snow dome and an alien model. We then proceded out of the room and back down the corridor to Rishi and Steve.

Then I fell over purposely and lay on my back with my hands on my face, I sat up into a hunched seated postion on the floor and looked up at my friends looking at me in a strange way. I looked at steve and asked if he was gonna come on a walk.

As we ran down the corridor following my two other friends, Neil and Harley. We came into a tall room. on the left wall was a ramp, and on the opposite wall was a blue slide with a loop the loop on it. A kid went down it sitting in a little car but wasn't allowed to go around the loop the loop. The next kid was 4 so he was, but didnt make it. The next kid did a whole loop the loop and carried on toward the end of the slide, he gracefully went over a high gap around 2 foot wide and landed in the car on a ramp the opposite side.

Me and steve wandered up the ramp toward a door in the wall. This is where I thought we were going to go. However Neil and Harley went across a beam that ran along the roof of the building. I followed them in excitement.

Someone from below us called up and shouted at us to get down because weren't meant to be up there. Harley lost his balance and fell off the beam, he hit his back on a canoe that was tied up onto the roof. This sent him into a spin, he did lots of sideway spins, spread his arms out like a spread eagle, and landed perfectly. Richard Peel then took a run up, did a dive straight toward the floor and also landed perfectly on his feet. Then people were urging me to jump too, I slowly looked over the edge and woke up.

Leaving out the hours of dreams where I had to pee,

I had blissful, blissful dreams about a time not far in the future where Beth, kanon42, and I were all working at Stargazer Ranch School (which see). It was, oddly enough, located in the subbasement of my old Junior High School, and the main occupation of teachers and students alike seemed to be the forceful removal of burnt popcorn from the floor.

After a time, we all went outside, because a gaggle of Girl Scouts had entered, resplendent in green uniformed glory, to take over the popcorn job. Attending to assorted pastoral duties like grooming farm animals and playing with small children, we watched the sun rise -- though it was rising horizontally, from one end of the sky to the other.

This dream had a profound emotional effect on me; it's made me realize how much I truly want to participate in Stargazer. Build it, make it work, make it happen. I got myself out of one horrid rut -- working for the Man (Bristol-Myers Squibb, doing unix sysadmin busywork) -- and I am, truth be told, quite happy being at Rutgers -- but I have to keep perspective, and understand that there's nothing on earth that has the power to hold me back, ever, from doing what I want to do. If I want to go out to Colorado and work on Stargazer, I will.

I will not be constrained by anyone or anything to do that which I do not wish to do.

3 / 7

  • I was Jon Cryer and I needed snow peas for the stirfry. I was really happy in the grocery store - I may have skipped down the freezer aisle. I thought, Maybe I'll go to KMart. Jon Cryer would go to KMart. It's kitschy!   Everything was great until I reached for the snow peas and the girls' hands were covering them. They were laughing - "snow peas" was an in-joke from high school, but I couldn't remember what it meant, though I knew it was about me and I knew it was mean. I stormed away. They collapsed in laughter. I went back and grabbed a handful of snow peas and threw them in her face. I bet you're going to think I was looking at your butt. Real funny!   They laughed and laughed and Jon Cryer walked away and then I was the girl.

    I laughed and then I cried; I felt awful. I was crying blood. The other girl poured me some tea but I cried blood into it and she made a face and took it away. On the phone I tried to explain to someone how much I really loved him, snow peas were my way of expressing it.

  • Something with a tiny animal and having to paint signs for the play
  • "The film did well in Paris."
    "Yes, well, you got a D in French at Stoli."
    Squeezing lemon juice. They both knew there was no film. But the cameras didn't know.
  • The Doberman flirters lied about their ages. Didn't matter, we knew they were gay Soho boys.
  • I cracked my fortune cookie and accidentally ripped the fortune The half I read said "freedom on his face."
The three men turned to me, and chuckled, before moving in. It was unfortunate, I suppose, that fighting was necessary... But I had given them ample warning, and it almost seemed too easy, I mused, that these three full grown men should fall so quickly to a boy.


Solomon and I left the final house, boxes of electronics in our arms. We stopped at a donut shop down the road, and began to divide our loot. Again, we laughed, and found amusement in the fact that most people work for weeks, if not months, to get the kind of money that we had just made in a few hours.

When the police entered, we waved, and bought them a round of honey-glazed.
Dream Deja Vu

  • It's a sunny day and I'm standing in the cool shade by a country dirt road that runs along the edge of a small river gorge below. I listen to the sound of the water running over the rocks as I stand quietly, thumbing for a ride. Soon enough an old-fashioned truck picks me up and the driver is my good friend and teacher, Lloyd. As we drive, we talk. And as we talk, Lloyd changes into somebody else. I wake up from shock.

  • With Mario, Allen and others by a river gorge at night. As we walk to the edge I get deja vu and remember the place from previous dreams. This triggers the dream to become a lucid dream. I rise into the air and fly up over the dark water of the river. My friends are impressed and I tell Allen to light me up with his laser pointer. I land on the other side of the river and recognize the same spot I had been hitckhiking from. I turn night into day.

    Once again, Lloyd picks me up. I explain the situation, putting it out in the open: This is a dream. I don't want to wake up. Please don't change into someone else because it disturbed me last time. It works and we soon arrive at an outdoor marketplace. I walk around a bit and then wake up.

    Or think I do, anyway. I'm in my living room at home with my girlfriend, Genery. My mother is there too and she puts some old home video into the VCR to embarass me.

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