I tripped on LSD
the night of March 6th, so I didn't sleep at all, however, come the 7th, I was ready for a nap.
The dream was bad
, I'd even call it a nightmare
except that it wasn't at night, so I'd call it a "daymare" or a "napmare
Anyhow, the basic
theme of the dream
was that I'm breaking things. I'm breaking things that I can't break. I'm breaking things that are unbreakable, not that they are invincible, or immaculate
, or that I'm to weak, or don't have the ability to break
them, they are just things that don't break.
Example: I broke the number
I broke my name also.
You know how when you break something that you really like you thing "well, this will never be the same again"? That's how I felt. I felt like a the number 6 would never be the same
again, I felt like everytime I wrote the number
6 I would remember that it was broken. That wasn't that bad, I don't really care all that much about the number 6
My name on the other hand, was a terrible loss.
I remember seeing myself breaking my name in the dream. What happened was I was writing in a journal of mine, and at the end I signed my name (which I never
do, and My hand
got all jimminie like I had a hand spasm, and my name got all fucked up
. I always write in pen, so I couldn't fix it, so it was broken. But it wasn't just broken on that page, I felt like it would be broken forever, everytime I wrote it, I would write it all spasm-y.
I woke up feeling very very bad. I had that heavy feeling that you get when you just did something really wrong, like got arrested, the feeling you get when you know something really bad is going to happen, like when you're in middle school and you've been glueing chairs in the cafeteria to the floor with marine epoxy, and then you're name get's called to the office.
That kind of feeling.
For the rest of the day I felt really bad, and couldn't tell why, then I remembered the dream, and realized that neither the number 6 nor my name were broken, that made me feel better.
But I was still sleep