Dream Log: June 29, 2000

Had several dreams I remember from last night, probably because I was awake, asleep, awake, asleep for much of the morning. They're fading as I type, which is why the Dream Log is important.

The dream that stays in my head from last night is the waves. I'm staring out my window and I notice water in the background - a long plain of blue sea water, stretching off to the horizon. Somehow, the focus shifts, and I'm in the water, floating, as if I'd always been there. There's no shock of suddenly being wet like there is when I really jump in the ocean, it's just a comfortable, restful thing. Though of course there's a wave coming.

Not too large, but large enough that I want to duck under it rather than have it crash on me. I try to swim down as it comes, but all I can do is curl up into a fetal position and lie there as it crashes over me and down the water.

Nothing new. When I was young, this was one of my favorite things to do at the beach - swimming, ducking under the waves, popping up afterwards, though usually I swam down.

So I don't feel bad, and if anything, it somewhat excited me. I looked forward to the next wave, which came sooner than expected, that being part of the nature of waves. That one was fine too, but still, all I could do is go fetal. I couldn't dive under the wave, yet I was strangely not very concerned with this. Another wave came, higher, faster, rougher. It crashed before me, which means one has to dive under the resulting whitewater. I didn't, and it tossed me around under water. I popped up behinds its wake, unconcerned, and another came. And another. And another, growing and swelling all the time. Each time I went under the waves I stayed under for a longer time. I didn't care, didn't turn around to try to swim to the beach. I didn't even know if there was a beach.

There's a certain loss of perception when you're ducking waves - being in the water yourself, they look larger than they do to someone on shore. Still, when the last one came, it was huge to everyone. And I couldn't dive under it. It broke upon the water with a strangely dull roar, and I curled up into the fetal position, and it struck me, sucked me under. I was under the water getting thrown around like only whitewater will do for quite a long time. I heard a woman's voice scream something from the beach, but I didn't care. Didn't care about anything...

I think I woke up about then. I don't remember exactly, but there's no continuous memory after that. The thing that scared me wasn't the water, but the way I was so sedate about the whole experience. I didn't struggle, even in my mind. It was like I was on Valium or something. Scary.

We were at a venue with lots of building and courtyards. Maybe my old school. There were more than a hundred people there, waiting for an event to start. A party, speach or rave maybe. It was afternoon. Security was a bit tense, as there was a strong fear of something or someone untoward having been smuggled in. A bomb or something I dunno. Everything had been searched several times for it.

We were sitting on the rich dark green grass in a quad. Someone comes past with a bunch of plastic roses. He shows with a frown how they are a bit creased where they had searched between the fabric petals. I feel a bit concerned that the intruder has not been located yet in spite of this inconvenience. I don't feel at all angry at the security. I feel that it is necessary.

Someone next to me points at the lush lawn and says "hey, there's a dope plant there". I don't see it. I point my finger down at the ground and he directs me to what he sees "left, out a bit, no back, just about there". I am led to it, it's clearly not grass but clearly not a dope plant either - same colour as the grass but a bit taller, thicker and with transparent plasticy sheath around the whole thing. On top is a budding flower(?) head with four spines that looks like it could grow to be a crown, microphone, sci-fi weapons system or radio antenae dish when it is mature. It must be growing very rapidly, and should be mature in a few hours. I'm interested and puzzled by this extraordinary plant.

As soon as I wake I can add it up: The vegetation is the intruder. The plant is a plant.