Dolphins are a small type of whale, in a group of mammals called cetaceans. They are warm-blooded creatures that almost always live in salt water, and can be found in nearly every ocean. Most live on the coast, remaining near to the shore, but some live out in the sea, away from land. Among the different types of dolphins are the Bottle-nosed dolphin, the Pilot whale, the White-sided dolphin, the Common dolphin, the Killer whale, and more.

The body structure of the dolphin is slim, enabling it to swin at incredible speeds. They are equipped with two powerful flippers, and usually a dorsal fin for balance, though not every type of dolphin has one. A tail fin, known as the fluke and is very strong indeed, is an important contributing force to any dolphin speeding through the waves (as they do). Their skin is smooth and rubbery, and they breathe with their lungs through a nostril on the top of their heads called the blowhole. The common dolphin, like humans, has a brain, esophagus, two shoulder blades, ribs, lungs, liver, stomach, intestines, kidneys, hip bone, and anus. They have what is called a melon in front on their skull, above their jaw, located where we might consider it to be the "forehead" of the dolphin. They also have enormous backbones.

Dolphins tend to mate in spring and early summer, during which the two genders, called (confusingly) bulls (for males) and cows (for females), bump heads and take part in other rituals. Pregnant dolphins are usually pregnant for 10 to 12 months, and upon finally giving birth, (having been helped by two other fellow dolphins in the procedure) help their newborn to the surface for the first breath of air.

Dolphins are one of the most intelligent species alive on our planet. They communicate with a wide variety of sounds, each of which may represent a different situation or emotion, such as danger or excitement. They also have incredible eyesight, hearing, and sense of touch, but they have almost no sense of taste or smell. However, they have another sense which is completely alien to us homo sapiens. Dolphins have a "natural sonar system" called echology, which is exactly what the name suggests. The dolphin releases a series of clicking and whistling sounds through the melon, which then rebound off from objects in front of it. The dolphin, upon hearing the echoes of these sounds, can sense the location and shape of everything in its path.

Dolphins are fantastic friends to our species. I have heard stories of packs of dolphins fighting off sharks from stranded sailors, and lost men at sea being towed to shore at no price. Out in the waves, they swim right up to waiting surfers, no fear, no discrimination, and maybe do a jump or a flip for them. I watch them body surf the incoming waves out in the Pacific, free from thoughts of getting revenge against the assholes who pollute their home and spear their relatives. They just want to be.

Information from the World Book Encyclopedia

Dolphins are quite possibly the horniest mammals alive. Various accounts of sexually aroused male dolphins poking divers with their penises have been recorded. It also has been discovered that groups of younger male dolphins will regularly isolate, and sexually assault females in their pod to give themselves a leg up (they don't have any legs!) in the dominance department.

The Dolphin has for decades been Australia's most popular model of flashlight, manufactured by Eveready, and being completely waterproof. It is favoured by the emergency services and scoutleaders.

Also a species of fish. More commonly known by its Hawaiian name Mahi-Mahi, schools of dolphin are often found travelling up and downcoast lines following warm water currents.

Dolphin is an beautifully colored fish with colors that colors include emerald green, bright deep blue, gold, and silver. They had distictly blunt foreheads and a body which sharply narrows from head to tail. Dolphins also lack scales.

They are a fast growing fish, up to 30 pounds, and live for up to 5 years. And when cooked, are delicious.
Atari 2600 Game
Produced by: Activision
Model Number: AX024
Atari Rarity Guide: 3 Scarce
Year of Release: 1983

Very strange music based game for the Atari 2600. You have to decode Dolphin language. Very strange indeed.

Listen! An endangered dolphin is calling you! Only by learning the dolphin's sonic language can you guide her through schools of seahorses, battling a monstrous squid, to gain magic powers from and elusive seagull. Hurry! Lend an ear...
Matthew Hubbard was the programmer on this title.

This game is valued at around $3 USD. Games with boxes and manuals are worth more.

On the way home from Tesco, having bought some food, I began to contemplate George Romero's 'Dawn of the Dead', in particular a sequence in which one of the heroes, having been bitten by a zombie, realises that his final hours are upon him; "You'll take care of me, when I go?" he asks his best friend, "I don't want to be walking around... like that". "I'm going to try not to come back", he says.

"I'm going to try... not to".

It's no use, of course, and he comes back as a zombie, a bewildered, scared zombie whose brains are promptly blown out, off-screen, by his pal. I am not an expert on religion, but I believe that many religions hold reincarnation as a central plank of their belief structure, albeit reincarnation as an animal or living person rather than as a zombie. And I got to thinking, as I walked up the hill.

Assuming that one must return as an animal, I believe that most people, having given that matter a little thought, would rather come back as a dolphin. Dolphins are clever like us, live as long as us, and eat fish - just like us. Raw fish, it has to be said, but it would easier to get used to eating raw fish than eating worms, or dung, for example. Indeed some otherwise normal human beings actually enjoy eating raw fish, although it must be said that some human beings derive sexual pleasure from watching cows defecate.

Are the sushi-eaters themselves reincarnants of dolphins? Turtles live longer than people, but they live precarious lives (and so do dolphins, so - trawlermen! - put those nets away!). Whales are very similar to dolphins, but they aren't sexy. Dolphins are sexy, in both the 'fast sports car' sense - dolphins are a great piece of design - and in the other sense, and of course as a dolphin you yourself would feel no shame in looking at lady dolphins in the other sense.

Dolphins are mammals, and do not lay eggs. Instead, they lay men, and drink air. If they laid eggs, the eggs would sink, and the baby dolphin would be crushed by the water pressure or, if the egg was incompressible, the hatched baby dolphin would drown on his or her way to the surface. Therefore the egg would need an air pocket in order to float on the surface of the water; eggshells are permeable, and the baby dolphin could suck very hard in order to draw air through the shell, which would have the positive effect of increasing the dolphin's lung power.

The obvious problem however is that the eggshell, floating on the water, would become a magnet for seagulls, who would peck at the shell and eat the baby dolphin, just as we eat the unborn young of chickens. There's nothing to be ashamed of in that. America eats its young. Those who survive are either strong, or rancid, or lucky; same thing. It's all about strategies for survival. You can either be strong, or charming, or repulsive, or funny, or just plain lucky. You're either Cary Grant or Lemmy or John Candy, all successful in their own fields, all very different men.

Therefore the dolphin's eggs would have to have a thick shell, which leads to a further problem, in that the baby dolphin would be unable to escape after having come to term. The solution would be to provide the baby dolphin with an 'escape hatch' on the underside of the shell, by making the shell thinner there, and putting the air pocket at the thicker end of the shell (the egg would probably resemble a chicken egg, floating fat-side-down in the water, with only the tip visible above the surface).

The egg would thus be impregnable to all but noxious gas, and of course you have to accept certain risks. The seagulls could land on the top and make their nest there, perhaps blocking air ingress, in which case the egg would have to be either very slippery or very pointy in order to dissuade the birds.

So there you have it. Dolphin eggs would be the shape of pyramids. Granted, they would not be indestructible, but nothing in nature is indestructible, not even the aliens from the film 'Alien'. I can't imagine the degree of pain to which the mummy dolphin would be subjected as she gave birth to this pointy egg, Iron Maiden's 'Where Eagles Dare' - from their fourth album, 1983's 'Piece of Mind' - was based on the film of the same name, and even includes a mock 'machine gun battle' with sound effects. Perhaps coincidentally, it vaguely resembles Queen's 'Battle Theme' from their soundtrack to the 1980 film 'Flash Gordon'.

Dol"phin (?), n. [F. dauphin dolphin, dauphin, earlier spelt also doffin; cf. OF. dalphinal of the dauphin; fr. L. delphinus, Gr. a dolphin (in senses 1, 2, & 5), perh. properly, belly fish; cf. womb, Skr. garbha; perh. akin to E. calf. Cf. Dauphin, Delphine.]

1. Zool. (a)

A cetacean of the genus Delphinus and allied genera (esp. D. delphis); the true dolphin

. (b)

The Coryphaena hippuris, a fish of about five feet in length, celebrated for its surprising changes of color when dying. It is the fish commonly known as the dolphin. See Coryphaenoid.

The dolphin of the ancients (D. delphis) is common in the Mediterranean and Atlantic, and attains a length of from six to eight feet.

2. [Gr. ] Gr. Antiq.

A mass of iron or lead hung from the yardarm, in readiness to be dropped on the deck of an enemy's vessel.

3. Naut. (a)

A kind of wreath or strap of plaited cordage.

(b)

A spar or buoy held by an anchor and furnished with a ring to which ships may fasten their cables.

R. H. Dana. (c)

A mooring post on a wharf or beach.

(d)

A permanent fender around a heavy boat just below the gunwale.

Ham. Nav. Encyc.

4. Gun.

In old ordnance, one of the handles above the trunnions by which the gun was lifted.

5. Astron.

A small constellation between Aquila and Pegasus. See Delphinus, n.,

2.

Dolphin fly Zool., the black, bean, or collier, Aphis (Aphis fable), destructive to beans. -- Dolphin striker Naut., a short vertical spar under the bowsprit.

 

© Webster 1913.

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