Dear Natasha,

I was down with your father again down by the docks, and you never told me how fast a runner he was. After that boat got ahold of him, wow. We found a little whiskey in his pocket after that. Anyways, me and Uncle Jay were thinkg how much money we could make if we took all the stray dogs in Long Beach down to the pound and turned em in.

So we got your father a little woozy and got him into this dog costume I had in the back of my gremlin. I used to work at Petsmart. And so we were luring dogs in to the trunk and then hitting them over the head with a piece of shag glass. Some of em had leashes and tags but we took those off. Any ways most of em we couldn't fit in the back so we had to put em in front, but we ran out of room there too so we left your father on a bench outside. He's a big man he can take care of himself.

Anyways when we got all the dogs to the pound most of the dogs had fallen out of the car or died in the trunk so we had to dump them back out to sea. And it turns out they don't give you money for catching dogs. So we went back to get your father.

We found him in the ladies restroom without any clothes on and his wallet was gone. So we let him sit in the BACK of the car. I will see you this weekend. Come visit me at the hospital soon.

- Uncle Drew


Dear Natasha,

Uncle Jay has once again run a muck with his car. He broke his leg and is now in the hospital but he is ok so don't worry. Those two, can't live with em can't live without em. I mean really, how many dogs CAN you fit into a car.

Anyways, you be good don't anger your mother with that smart talkin i heard you use on me. No more of that. And stay OUT of the liqour cabinet, or else santy won't bring you no presents. Love ya darlin'.

- Your Aunty Carol

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