Crud is billiard game played nearly exclusively by air force
officers through out the Western world. It's believed the game originated in Canada with the Royal Canadian Air Force
during World War II, specifically at the RCAF
base in Gander
. This explains its viral-like adoptions by air forces within the Western defense alliance as Gander acts as a jumping off point for American, Canadian, and European military aircraft.
I should note at this point calling Crud a billiard game is a bit inaccurate. It's like calling dodge ball
a variant of volley ball
. Crud makes use of only two billiard
balls (the cue ball
and one of the striped balls) and it involves the use of no pool cues. It's again conjectured that the game came about because there were few, if any, available pool cues in the officers mess
during and since the war. Men from air forces of different nations get drinking, begin comparing engine sizes, etc, and soon pool sticks become weapons. And they get broken.
Okay so the rules of Crud are basically like this. The team on deck
fields a server. The other team fields a receiver
or more accurately a "blocker
". The server
has to grab the cue ball and fling it across the table at the striped ball. The blocker has to protect the striped ball. If the server hits the striped ball, the blocker is killed. A team member can be killed 3 times before he's out of the game. Once all your team mates are killed, you lose and you're in for beer for the rest of the night.
If the server misses he has to retrieve the ball and try again. If he misses three times in a row, he's killed. However, if he hits the striped ball, the blocker becomes instantly the new server. He has to run to the serving end and try to retrieve the ball from that end. The opposing team
, which previously was serving, puts a new blocker into place. It's important to note that in ball retrieval, the new server's body cannot move down the table. If he does, all the airmen
in the room can shout insults and swear words at him. He also loses a life. He must try and retrieve the ball from the serving end only. Once he has retrieved the cue ball, he has to serve and try to hit the striped ball before it stops spinning
. If he misses three times or the striped ball stops spinning, he loses a life.
Now the blocker's role in all of this is to essentially distract
the server. Using the rarely played "gentleman
's rules" the blocker tries to distract the server by waving his hands, shouting insults about the airman's wife
The "full-contact combat
rules" version allows the blocker to hip check
the server. The blocker cannot, however, attempt to grab the server's hands or arms. Walking on the surface of the pool table is frowned upon unless the table has been specifically rigged for full-contact combat rules Crud: rolls of toilet paper jammed in the pocket holes and the felt
surface is covered with outdoor carpet
Full-contact combat rules are particularly popular with junior grades as by ancient tradition, a junior grade is free to physically assault/harass
his superior officer
without fear of punishment. Anything else just wouldn't be cricket
... I mean Crud.