Manager to Elvis Presley. Ate him alive: made every effort to kill all his talent as long as his career would last.

Actually, his real name isn't Parker and I don't think he was a colonel, either. On second thought, he may be.

The original "giant sucking sound". A P.T. Barnum, with a hunky circus named Elvis. May well be to blame for those horrid all-singing, all-dancing MGM films The King did, and for putting the circus back on the road when detox or a fat farm might have been TRTTD. Took a huge cut of the take, even making a tidy sum on the Dead Elvis, until Priscilla Presley wrested control of All Things Graceland®. An illegal alien from The Netherlands, he had no passport, so the circus never left the US.

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