When I was a child I had a collection of chocolate bunnies stashed in my closet. The reason for this was that I could not bear to bite the head off of a cute little bunny. Do chocolate easter bunnies feel pain? How do you know? Who really knows?

My mother eventually caught on and, being a chocohaulic, began to offer to eat them for me. I loved my mother very much, so I let her have the bunnies I got for easter from her and my grandmother. I eventually began to recieve 6lb. chocolate easter bunnies made of german chocolate from my mother every year. Hrmm... I wonder why that is. :P

To this day I cannot eat chocolate bunnies.

Chocolate bunnies are metaphors for life.

Some chocolate bunnies are made of inferior chocolate that often has a layer of cocoa butter discoloring the outside. They taste just ok, but tend to be hollow and unsatisfying. Can be found almost everywhere with no effort.

Some bunnies are expensive, made of really good chocolate, and have some sort of creamy or fruity sweet filling inside them. These may or may not be satisfying, depending if the filling is to your taste or not. They're relatively easy to find in many stores.

The best chocolate bunnies are made of solid milk or dark chocolate, weigh at least twice as much as the average king-sized bar you can pick up at the supermarket or liquor store, and must be thwacked meaningfully on a counter in order to break off pieces small enough to actually fit in your mouth. Your taste buds, after all this effort, fully expect to have a screaming orgasm when the stuff hits your tongue. It takes actual work to get the fullest pleasure out of them, because they're often hard to find and quite dear to purchase. And that's the truth.

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