The Best Day of My Life

The Camel cigarette company is now my favorite corporation in the world.

I just got back from the liquor store. I walked down there to buy a pack of Kamel Red Lights, the new hot brand of cigarettes with the pretty box. I smoke for style more than taste.

Well I walked into the store and there were two guys behind the counter, one that I recognized from going in there all the time, and one that I'd never seen before. I asked for a pack of Kamel Red Lights, and the first guy got all flustered because he didn't have any.

The second guy leaned over and grabbed a pack of Camel Turkish Golds off the rack.

"Here! Try our new brand of cigarettes, Camel Turkish Golds. They're really smooth and delicious."

I just stared at him for a second and said a very hesitant "Okaaaaaay..." I handed the first guy four dollars.

The second guy went into a whole sales speech: "I work for the Camel corporation! We just released this new brand of cigarettes and we're trying to get the Marlboro Light customers to switch over to us."

"What a coincidence!" I said, "I was a Marlboro Light smoker all this time but I've just recently gotten sick of them!"

"Really?" He said, and then to the first guy "Here, I'll buy her a pack of cigarettes. Just ring her up for the first one."

My jaw dropped. FREE FUCKING CIGARETTES PURCHASED FOR ME BY A REPRESENTATIVE OF THE CAMEL CORPORATION. Fuck all that shit about the tobacco companies "making a killing off me," forget all the lies about them being seedy and underhanded, I don't believe that they're trying to trick little kids into picking up smoking. THE TOBACCO COMPANY IS MY BEST FRIEND! THEY BOUGHT ME A FREE PACK OF CIGARETTES!

I started chatting with the guy. "You know, the box on the Kamel Red Lights is really much prettier. It definately markets well to the younger generation. This box is just, well, ugly. It looks like the type of cigarettes an old person would smoke."

"Is that so.." he said, "I thought this box was quite nice. Notice how we have the blue on it? That's new."

"Yeah, the blue is a nice touch, but something flashier and more stylish would definately draw more of a crowd. This just makes me think it's the same old thing as all the other Camel cigarettes."

"Really, well, I'll be sure and let them know that. Thanks for the input. Why don't you go outside right now and try one and let me know what you think?"

The tobacco company encouraging kids to smoke? No way... this guy only has my best interests in mind.

"I'll do that right now!" I told him, "In fact, if I like it, I'll get all my friends to start smoking them! You're my best friend! Let's get married right now!!!"

Well I didn't really ask him to marry me, but I did go outside and try a new Camel Turkish Gold. And you know what? It was positively delicious.

Long live Mr. Reynolds, of the Reynolds Tobacco Co.
Turkish golds have got to be the best damn cigarettes every made. Simply because when Trukish golds first came out there were in the 2 for one deal, And here where I live smokes can run you upto 5.50 a pack. So I said hell yeah! I'll buy some turkish golds... Damn how surprised I was to find out that the turkish golds didn't actaully taste that bad. Kinda mild with a light flavoring that's slighltly sweet almost like a clove but not strong and made of tobbacco.

I guess my point here is not all cheep cigarettes taste like shit. But beyond that if you haven't had a smoke in a few years or were just begining to dislike the taste of cigarettes, try turkish golds... Hell try them ever if you don't smoke.


True while I do enjoy smoking my cigarettes, my favorites are: The after sex cigarette, the first thing in the morning cigarette, and or course the post bowl cigarette.

I can verify that the cigarettes sold as Camel Turkish Gold in the States really are sold by Camel in Turkey, and have been for some time before the whole launch of the Turkish Gold line Stateside. I used to know this girl whose parents were posted at the American Embassy in Turkey, and whenever she'd go to visit her folks out there, she'd bring back a few cartons of Turkish Camels and give out the packs to her friends as presents.

They were definently the same blend of tobacco as what's sold as Camel Turkish Golds now; to me at least, the flavor's pretty unmistakable. There were some interesting differences in the packaging, though. The packs lacked the blue and faux-gold-leaf motif so beloved in the American cigarettes, and of course rather than presenting themselves and Camel Turkish Gold, they were simply Camels. Most interestingly, the motto at the bottom, rather than identifying itself as a "Smooth & Mellow Turkish Blend", read "Fine American Tobacco". The cigarettes themselves had the same little ring of little gold psis around the filters.

Now this raises some interesting questions. Is the tobacco in Turkish Golds actually from America or Turkey? I can understand the marketing logic in the switch, since each country seems faintly exotic and decadent to people in the other, and exotic and decadent are two things that plenty of people look for in a cigarette. But they can't both be true. I'd swear on a stack of bibles that the blend in both cigarettes is the same, but something funny's going on somewhere.

One thing I know for sure, though: them's some damn fine cigarettes.


Update, Jul. 2002 - Paleron tells me that Turkish Golds are made of Turkish tobacco, grown in the US. Which would make both pieces of advertising true. Perhaps this mystery is solved.

Released in the first quarter of 2000, Camel Turkish Golds were part of a maneuver by R.J. Reynolds (NYSE: RJR) to revitalize their Camel brand and reposition themselves in the cigarette market. At the time, Camels were still considered by many to be a brand to buy when you were too cheap to afford Marlboro - And an image like that certainly isn't flattering. By bringing to the American what was long a popular blend in Turkey, updating the aesthetics of the packaging, and initiating an aggressive marketing campaign geared at Marlboro smokers, Camel has been able to garner a significant increase in respect, a modest growth in repeat buyers, and at the same time, increased its stock price three and a half fold*.

This all started with the introduction of the Camel Turkish Gold blend. As has been the case since 1913, Turkish Golds are a marriage of American and Turkish tobaccos, selected for a sublimely smooth, subtly sweet flavor, with no wretched-tasting finish. This certainly lives up to the slogan that they're given, "Smooth and Mellow Turkish Blend." While much of the tobacco used in Turkish Golds is indeed of Turkish variety, all of it is grown here in the United States, on RJ Reyold's massive tobacco farms.

In line with their goal to woo Marlboro devotees, the Turkish Gold smokes much like a Marlboro Lights, however, they lack the slight woody aftertaste and are much sweeter in comparison. On a personal note, I was one of those Marlboro fans, smoking them for almost 3 years before a friend introduced me to Turkish Golds, after which, I haven't looked back.

The packaging of the Camel Turkish Golds stands out in stark contrast to the "Classic Blends" line of cigarettes. Where the Classic boxes are somewhat sparse in design, utilizing pale yellows, subdued blues, and minimalist design tendencies, the "Turkish Blends" line embraces more saturated colors and increased visual complexity. This makes them more appealing to their target market segment. Turkish Golds, specifically, are packaged in a flip top box, or hard pack, emblazoned with the classic Camel logo, set against a light gold bazaar scene replete with distinctly Turkish architecture. The top and bottom of the box are adorned with a royal blue border, which is lined with mildly reflective gold psis sandwiched between gold lines. The "Camel" brand name is done in the same hue of blue, and sports a gold border. The box is, truly, a work of art.

The cigarettes themselves stand out as well, featuring the same psi and line pattern in gold just before the filter. The filter itself, instead of being a single matte color, looks ornate and detailed, a gentle gradation between a medium and dark shade of tan. The cigarette, truly, is a work of art.

And ahhh, the flavor. I've already spoken of that. It bears repeating that it, truly, is a work of art.

The soothing and seductive Camel Turkish Gold only possesses 10 milligrams of tar and .8 milligrams of nicotine per cigarette, compared to 11 milligrams of tar and .8 milligrams of nicotine for Marlboro Lights. They are available in standard size and 100's. Put that in your pipe and smoke it!

Despite the fact that Camel Turkish Golds have been on store shelves since early 2000, RJ Reynolds still runs frequent promotions in gas stations nationwide. These promotions usually consist of a Camel representative who offers to "buy" a pack of Marlboro Lights off of a customer in exchange for four packs of Turkish Golds. If you see one of these Camel reps, it would be wise to buy a pack of Marlboro Lights, and then feign curiosity, inquiring why he was there. When he mentions he's buying packs of Marlboro Lights off people, you can declare in true "Cheesy 50's advertisement" fashion, "Well, I'll be, I just happened to buy a pack of those just a moment ago! What a coincidence!"

This node has been brought to you by our friend, lung cancer. In order to meet all federal regulations regarding "Tobacco Advertising," this node is laced with subliminal messages to deter smoking. Remember kids - Smokers are chokers. All downvotes should be directed to Donfreenut.

Also, one may occasionally find a Turkish Golds display in stores, adorned with packs and packs of cigarettes, priced at buy 1, get 1 free, or buy 2, get 1 free. Technically, it's not entirely true, because the packs will ring up more than a single pack, but you'll pay significantly less than if you bought 2 normal packs separately, and 10 packs bought in this method will even cost less than a carton.


* Stock price from $20 (January, 2000) to $70 (April, 2002). http://www.rjrt.com/

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