• If I was the ocean, what would you be to me?
• If all you did was node, your writeups wouldn't be very interesting, would they?
• The Man Who Would Be King
• I Would Be Content To Live For But A Day
• If I was any good at this, I would be getting paid
• Jessica, too tall but still lovely, was not sure she would or should drop the whale
• We do what we do because of who we are. If we did otherwise, we would not be ourselves.
• everyone who ever told me i was pretty was lying.
• The Firestone dealership was full to the brim with cars. But I reasoned I would need a boat, since my desire was to go to Ireland. Just then a harsh reminder surfaced; water is expensive in hell.
• If everyone had a flower instead of a gun, there would be no more war
• people who were not to be trifled with; people who would dance, and had no notion of walking
• when I am King, we will have no such things, but, my lads, if the old king my father were dead, we would be all kings.
• Men are designed to be good hunters, but it's women who are born killers
• He made me promise I would do this when I was next sad. So I promised myself I would not be sad again.
• People tell us who they are, but we ignore it, because we want them to be who we want them to be.
• I always knew I would have a 21st birthday but I never thought I'd be 21
• Hot pursuit
• The dog who would not come in
• I died for Beauty -- but was scarce
• Back when grunge was still cool
• That'd be the butt, Bob
• The Princess who was Hidden Underground
• Seriously, though, who the hell did I think I was going to become?
• Where's the kaboom?
• The Bus Driver Who Wanted to be God
• who would play (Deleted) in the movie of (Deleted)?
• Your noise would not be missed here.
• you never felt her hot blood on your face but, hey, who's keeping track
• The Princess Who Kicked Butt
• How long would utilities last if everyone disappeared tomorrow morning?
• If there were more people like you, there would be less people
• I don't want to be a weeping mass of emotion, but I am
• There was never supposed to be an Episode 7, 8, or 9
• Boy, I was sure lucky to be born into the one true faith!
• The economy has hit everyone hard. Well, everyone who hasn't lost track of how many houses they own, anyhow.
• I may be a trenchie bitch, but you forget we wear combat boots!
• Why Star Trek: Series V would be a bad thing
• I thought that I wanted this. I didn't realize it would be so hollow
• Who would win in a fight between a shark and a lion on the moon?
• Trying desperately to be cool
• Music need not be popular to be good
• Three-year-old boys can be cool
• Never Again Would Birds' Song Be the Same
• She was thinking of a boy in California who had a couch and a job
• In a world of blind people, c would be the speed of sound
• All the while he was talking she was thinking what his whiskers would feel like on the back of her neck
• I may be lying in the gutter, but I am looking up at the stars
• He was the kind of man who shacked up for shelter
• He wasn't programmed to be a tenor, he was programmed to be a physician!
• We all love movies and books about us owning ourselves
• strange and too short but I was lonely
• Snatched away, like the Lindberg baby, who everyone talked about, which explains my lifelong fear of ladders.
• The world would be in much better shape if our leaders were hamsters
• But I don't want to be Princess Leia!
• I remember when it was me who made her skin flush
• If the Windows source code was leaked, what do you think would happen?
• If I was a woman I'd be a feminist too
• I assumed we would not even be friends
• I was Dan for fifteen minutes and I never want to be Dan again
• Who Will Survive, and What Will Be Left of Them?
• he thought it would be great fun to conquer the world
• words I've wanted to tell you but never seem to be able to
• Gods exist but will only talk to those who stay awake after bedtime under the covers.
• I was so cool, that first afternoon
• The Story of the Vizier Who Was Punished
• All I want for Christmas is to be cooled
• Linux would be dead without Windows
• The dog who would not back off
• They wrote it all in perl but it was mostly system calls
• I was burned and bleeding, but the galaxy still spun on
• But can you imagine what that would do to all those juggaloes?
• Lame fuckwit who should be shot for wasting valuable bandwidth
• English may be a "living language," but Latin is not -- so get it right.
• If I were watched alone, I'd be considered insane
• But, my dear sir, if you educate them, they will no longer be Baptists
• In the future everyone will be world-famous for fifteen minutes
• Unraveling things you would never be able to say with words.
• Who Would Jesus Bomb?
• Who would win in a knife fight between Webster 1913 and Vulgar Tongue 1811 on the moon?
• But who nodes the noders?
• If language were liquid, it would be rushing in
• Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it
• Who Was the Wine Girl?
• I may be cold and calculating, but that doesn't make me a computer
• The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!
• Seems I might have stolen the blue part of her rainbow, but all I really did was make it bigger, a way bigger blue
• I would've taken an axe to it, but I'm pretty sure the dryad would have pulverized me
• "Hey wouldn't it be cool if we could do this" rule
• The Story of the Envious Man and of Him Who Was Envied
• Look, I don't mean to be an asshole or anything, but...
• The Scots Confession: Chapter 18
• I can never be sure if it was real or just another illusion
• this was supposed to be a parable about the power of the imagination
• The Saudis were terrified that someone was going to be a better Muslim than they were
• It was hormones, it was hormones, but it was valid
• I don't know who Amber is, but she's got a stalker
• the desert was once alive, but I don't remember it
• The flowers smiled, but she was gone
• But if you destroy the world, where would we live?
• the river was cool. I wiped off every dangerous, sacred drop.
• To a girl who thought she was moving away
• This guy in the computer lab who looks like he should be a doctor
• Wouldn't it be wonderful if everyone renounced violence forever?
• it doesn't matter who I was, all that matters is who I am
• I set the alarm clock anyway, knowing I would be up all night
• it would be hilarious if only
• Would you take your shoes back now, i think I know what it is like to be you.
• Oh, no. Look, you've gone and made me optimistic. I was before, but now it is showing.
• Boston sports fans and their teams: A brief but angsty perspective
• Somebody told me a story. It was pretty but boring. It was Saturday night, my stories usually end up that way.
• I would kiss you, but I don't know how to kiss
• I was shaking, but not from the cold
• Why don't you just rip my heart out, it would be quicker and less painful
• I remember when it was me who made her toilet flush
• Of Gods and Men: Who Was This Man Called the Christ?
• A child who will clearly grow up to be as demented as me
• I remember when it was me who made you want to take over the world and enslave humanity
• Not to die but to be reborn...
• If Huey Lewis Isn't Still Cool Then How Can I Be?
• If you were a vegetable, what kind of vegetable would you be? (registry)
• It's cooler than eating shit, but not as cool as munching pussy.
• He was born with the gift of logic but the inability to use it
• The real horror was not what had been redacted, but the reasons why.
• You find yourself being chased not only by the bad guys, but also by what should be the good guys
• To all the cold people who want to be warm again
• Who shouted with glee when the colour blue was born?
• Starving in the greenhouse
• She was too beautiful to be human
• And then they came for me, but the bridge would not ignite.
• Three people who are spies and a horse who will also be a spy
• Be cool in college
• That I Would Be Good
• You meant for this node to be read by me, and I would like to respond
• Who Wants to Be a Millionaire Game at McDonald's
• We try to be friendly here. Those who are not friendly will be shot.
• Spikey the Werm may be a Werm, but he's got quite an imagination nonetheless!
• Cool To Be You
• If love was a circus, you'd be a clown
• Her self image was not the force field she imagined it to be
• Open source cars would be doing 200 mpg by now
• I know that all the cannabis activists would like you to believe differently but
• There was silence in my heart, but you found a way to break it.
• If anything were different, everything would be different
• It is never too late to be what you would have been
• If I had called you, would you still be dead?
• Pirates and ninjas: why they should be friends but can't be
• I figured things would be okay once the werewolf started to cry
• But who codes the coders?
• I bought an orange, but it was a grapefruit
• I would have tried, but Charlotte kept Charlotte in the world of Charlotte and she barely heard me
• Why people who get the wrong number make it out to be your fault
• Mind without body
• Would you tell me if it was true?
• Existentialism is that girlfriend who cheated on you. Postmodernism is who she was with.
• On two concert, I'm shootive collective photo but small, fat, bald headed technologist be insane
• To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring - it was peace.
• Having an S on a transcript rather than a B
• Nobody cares who would in a fistfight between Anne Frank and Lizzie Borden
• That would be me
• I ought to be grateful, but instead I'm angry
• I may be young, but I'm not naive
• Of the Birth of Volsung, the Son of Rerir, who was the Son of Sigi
• I couldn't possibly be the only one who doesn't see empathy as a curse
• There was a man who lived a life of fire
• This was the shinest golden dollar I would ever see in my life and I was not about to tarnish it.
• I'm Rudy Giuliani! I was mayor of New York on 9/11! I Should Be The President!
• Half-sour pickle
• Once, everyone was a computer novice
• When that cow would walk it was like she was dancing
• Any fool with a dick can make a baby but it takes a real man to be a father
• It is not our noise at all, but we are lucky to be listening
• Tribute to the Man Who Never Was (document)
• What I would do If I knew what was good for me
• I don't know what he was listening for, but he wasn't listening
• Susan Goldman, who has cervical cancer, is partly thankful as she braces herself but changes her mind as she's sprayed with burning jet fuel.
• I was me before being me was cool.
• play dumb
• I was supposed to be somebody by the age of 23
• Statements that would be shocking to people living in 1975
• The Tale of a Youth who set out to learn what Fear was
• How to approach a developer who may well be working and ask him a question

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