Boo Berry

Booberry is one of a series of monster cereals manufactured by General Mills. Joining ranks with Booberry is Frankenberry, Count Chocula and Fruity Yummy Mummy, a sinister yet delicious bunch of breakfast cereals. Booberry tends to be popular with those who enjoy enormous intakes of sugar and turning their mouths blue.

Booberry is still produced, but it can be hard to find in some areas. Fortunately for those who enjoy blue tongues, you can purchase the cereal directly from its manufacturer.

Ingredients:
Corn meal, sugar, marshmallow bits (sugar, dextrose, cornstarch, cornsyrup, gelatin, artificial flavor, red 40, blues 1 & 2), corn syrup, wheat starch, modified wheat starch, salt, partially hydrogenated soybean oil, dicalcium and tricalcium phosphate, trisodium phosphate, baking soda, vitamin C (sodium ascorbate), red 40 and blue 1, zinc and iron (mineral nutrients), A B vitamin (niacin), Vitamin B₆ (pyridoxine hydrochloride), vitamin B₂ (riboflavin), vitamin B₁, (thiamin mononitrate), artificial flavor, A B vitamin (folic acid), vitamin B₁₂. Freshness preserved by BHT.

(Actually "Boo-Berry") A light blue, blueberry flavored breakfast cereal whose "character" looks suspiciously like "Casper the Friendly Ghost" wearing a little yellow hat. One of General Mills' three marshmallow "monster" cereals — the remaining two being "Franken*Berry" (a pink, strawberry flavored cereal personified by a Frankenstein's Monster-esqe cartoon character) and "Count Chocula" (a brown, chocolate flavored cereal personified by a Dracula-esqe cartoon character)

OR

One of three players in the General Mills breakfast cereals trinity that dare not speak its name.

The other two players being of course:

• "Count Chocula" and
• "Franken*Berry"

Like something out of a Michener tome, Boo Boo Berries are blue, hide an amusing berry taste—dare I say "berryrific"?— and are personified by a soul of the dead. This ghost, this hovering spirit rises above the bowl taunting us with what it cannot put to words.

We are left confused. Are we to eat this offering? Or rather, should we run as fast as our legs will carry us — far away — to where there are no spoons or bowls, just the blissful mutterings of times past.

I believe it was Benjamin Franklin who said:

"Three can keep a secret if two of them are dead.".

Indeed, this may speak volumes to some malignant secret that needs to buried — for while I am able to obtain Frankenberries and Count Chocula at my local Kienows, strangely, Boo Boo Berries no longer grace the shelf. It may also warn of things to come... Chocula, Frankenberry... watch your backs!

[cue lightning and thunder, send royalties check to Vincent Price]

Quoth the raven: "no comment"

[Update: Boo-Berry can be purchased from General Mills' web site]