But that girl changes from day to day! Sometimes i'll see a girl on the street and that'll be the one. Just the way she carries herself. Or the attitude of that bass player in the little band at the open stage. The one who sold me the bagel the other morning, or that bulldyke from Texas. The girl with the same name as me who works in the kitchen where my housemate waitresses. OR - that girl that wrote the node which made me cry. Sometimes i wake up and think my ex-girlfriend, the poet, is the girl of my dreams. But she's so far away.

Ask her out? This would spoil the perfect crystalline crush. This would force me to negotiate the whole sexuality thing with a stranger, or with an acquaintance, and those negotiations are rarely sexy, but stumble and bring the event plummeting out of hormones and into politics. This would make her a reality that grates the sheen right off the dreams. Also, i'm shy. And yes, many girls prefer men. You never know.

I don't think there's a one true love out there. Everyone has the potential for perfection, and i fall in love with the facets of divinity shining from their presence.

Something you should do at least once in your life. The best way to deal with anxiety/fear over asking her out is totally detaching yourself from the situation as far as consequences are concerned. Make it not a big deal in your mind, even though it is. So what if she may say no? There's always a chance of failure or rejection in anything you do, the difference in this case is that the emotional stakes are higher. You drive a car, you may get a ticket or get in a wreck. You apply for a job, you may get turned down. You take a class, you may get a bad grade. Those may not be the greatest examples, because in each you usually have more control over what happens than you do when dealing with women, but such is life.

So don't worry about what will happen after you ask. Just ask her. Because being just friends sucks.

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