A usergroup for people who like nerding over (or bitching about) linguistics, english usage, punctuation, and giving each other writing feedback. Named after "eats, shoots and leaves".


Baroness Thatcher

She wasn’t ready.

She looked up at him and a surge of warmth hit her in the throat. She looked down again and saw his bags, everything he treasured packed neatly inside, sitting on the floor on either side of him. He was clutching his ticket.

She’d known it was coming. She wasn’t ready.

“I’ll call you,” he said. “As soon as I get there, I promise.” She smiled, intending to nod but couldn’t move.

A tear slid down her cheek. She wasn’t ready.

“Don’t cry, love,” he whispered, smoothing her hair with the palm of his hand. “You know I hate to see my lady cry.” He pulled her into his arms, knowing full well that she was wondering why he was leaving her, and he didn’t have an answer. He’d been offered a job – a good job – out of town, of course, and it was she who urged him to follow his heart and take it.

But she wasn’t ready.

He thought about all the other hard goodbyes that took place in that train station. Relocation. War. And those who, like him, were reluctantly breaking someone’s heart.

He held her for a long time; she silently hoped he’d change his mind. Something about the final boarding call came over the loudspeaker and she felt the blood rush from her face. He repeated his promise to call and added a second to return. He picked up his bags and turned to go; she shut her eyes and turned sideways.

Don’t turn around, she thought. The lady’s not for turning. But she turned around anyway, just in time to see him slip through the door and out of sight.

She shrunk onto the floor, her back pressed against the pillar, and sobbed uncontrollably.

She wasn’t ready.

A comma splice occurs when two independent sentences or clauses are spliced together with a comma.

Examples:

  • Wharfinger just found thirty dollars, he wants to buy a bucket of soy.
  • Everything2 is a nifty website, posting here improves my writing skills.

There is a complete clause before the comma and after the comma. There are several ways to correct comma splices:

  • Separate the clauses and make them separate sentences.
    • Wharfinger just found thirty dollars. He wants to buy a bucket of soy.
    • Everything2 is a nifty website. Posting here improves my writing skills.
  • Link the two closely related clauses with a coordinating conjunction, such as and, but, or, nor, for, so or yet.
    • Wharfinger just found thirty dollars, so he wants to buy a bucket of soy.
    • Everything2 is a nifty website, and posting here improves my writing skills.
  • Link the closely related clauses with a semicolon.
    • Wharfinger just found thirty dollars; he wants to buy a bucket of soy.
    • Everything2 is a nifty website; posting here improves my writing skills.
  • Reword the sentence to create one independent clause.
    • Wharfinger wants to buy a bucket of soy with the money he found.
    • Posting on the nifty website Everything2 helps to improve my writing skills.

Run-on Sentences

The secret to writing well is to write concisely. Everyone is guilty of padding their writing with fluff and flowery language. Run-on sentences usually appear when you're trying to shove too much information into one sentence. A fellow Everything2 member named Lith pointed out that most run-on sentences are actually comma splices without the comma.

Every sentence must have a separate idea. A well crafted sentence has one main noun and an associated verb. Modifiers for the nouns and verbs will reveal your style of writing.

Examples of Run-On Sentences:

  • I enjoy reading her nodes she writes funny stuff.
    • I posted a node about trolls they really make me angry and when I find one under a bridge I will make him write a coherent node and then I will make him post it.

Use the same suggestions for separating comma splices. Break up these sentences into complete sentences, or use coordinating conjunctions.

  • I enjoy reading her nodes. She writes funny stuff.
    • I posted a node about trolls. They really make me angry. When I find one under a bridge I will make him write a coherent node. I will then make him post it.

Suggestions for modifying this node are welcome. Please /msg Rancid_Pickle in the chatterbox if you have any suggestions. Special thanks to Wharfinger for unknowingly volunteering to buy that bucket of soy.


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