windigo's New Writeups

March 6, 2002 (idea)

2002-03-06T23:24:42Z

I don't always like myself for falling off the face of the earth, but sometimes there is no other alternative.<> As in right now, I haven't picked up a keyboard or made a long distance call in about a month. I just haven't wanted to.

Dad had a heart attack. What else is there to say? We can't get him stabilized enough to let him have the operation, so he'll stay right where he is until....Until what?!?!And I am dead serious about not hearing anything pitying. I refuse to feel sorry for myself, so I don't wanna hear anyone else feel sorry for me. Feel badly for him, he's the one who's really being dealt the unfairness. Being so damn uncomfortable, embarassed, frustrated, scared, in those friggin' beds unable to turn over on his side without someone helping him. I get to this point, and I hope someone has the sense and decency to take me out back and shoot me like the lame horse I am. This is all just so not fair!

So, let me do my thing, already. You now, go to ICU everyday,…

December 27, 2001 (idea)

2001-12-27T18:03:23Z

A lot of little worlds colliding.

Life is so gentle now, I can hardly believe it. Shitmas was blue, but merely because Christmas Pasts decided to drag themselves out of memory and air themselves before they got tucked back in for another year with the mothballs and cedar.

Class starts in two weeks, and I think I'm ready...Dad's okay, though the holidays always did make him a veritable badger. I have to remind him we're here to be with him and help, there's really no cause to be so difficult.

My brothers showed back up for Christmas Eve dinner, and my nephew Morgan (pint size viking) loved his stuffed gorilla, and decided to chase me all over the house with it.

Travel plans are solidifying for the Spring, and I'm looking really forward to January as being a time for me to hide. Besides, Thor will be moving the workshop over soon, and we have so many preparations before March and April.

New Year's? I asked to work that night so my…

November 14, 2001 (idea)

2001-11-14T18:09:45Z

North Avenue, North Avenue....Where the people ain't scared of the Boys in Blue.

Shipped Jacob back up to Baltimore two nights ago. His grandad's bad off, and I think he got as much R and R as he needed to get. Kash was upset he was leaving, I knew he needed to get going though, because he has so much to do when he got back. He just got an agent while he was down here, so things are looking up for the boy. DJ Goode and all that.

I got a wild hair on my ass and took the kids down to South Beach this last weekend before Jakey had to head back. We saw Russel, that was great. Club hopping, and 'Digo waking up Sunday morning in a 1950's -esque hotel room going, "Ohhhh, my head. What the hell was I thinking?" Miami. It was fun. And what a great way to start such a busy season for me.

Thanksgiving next week, then Lord Bear's coming down for 5 days the following week. The same day he leaves, Thor arrives by train, (Lucky bastard!) and we start planning the trip in…

October 30, 2001 (idea)

2001-10-30T20:12:33Z

Light as a feather, locked as a bathroom door.

Is it okay that I really don't want anyone touching me right now? Hummmph. I mean, I'm fine, I feel great....it's not that. It's just.....
Tomorrow. That will be an interesting day. Kash and I driving up to Jacksonville to pick up Jake from the station. He's supposed to be here at least four months, and I'm really glad he'll be here. Kash and I are going to support him for a bit, (actually, she's outta a job, so that will fall on me a bit....thus why I am giving up my comfy job for something that 1- pays better, 2-is in my area of expertise and 3- gives me my weekends back.) Anxiety sucks, I really think it's the worse possible thing for somebody's health, so......I have no problem helping a friend out.

Thor leaves for Montana Thursday...he'll only be gone 2 months, but I'm really gonna miss him. I don't feel crazy when I talk to him, I can't say that much about many people.

We had a wild ass party Saturday...all I know is I…

October 23, 2001 (idea)

2001-10-23T09:38:26Z

This amazing woman, who flashes me this incredible smile every day she stops by to pick up booze for her household, was wearing a shirt with Krishnamurti's face screen printed on it. I commented on it....it was a bit different. She beamed, dug in her purse for her card, slid it on the counter to me and said, "I'm Linda. I've been waiting to talk to you, Kir. Call me anytime, I swear." A radio host for WCEU, and spiritual healer....said so on her card. It wasn't until she left, that I realized I was NOT wearing my nametag.....

After Biketoberfest....which ROCKED! even though Bramer had to miss it because he had jobs lined up this weekend, I headed over to Kash's yesterday to check up on her.( Thor and I really wanted to hijack a hog.) I had had an amazingly greaseless breakfast at the old diner I used to work at, (the one where my boss would have a pound of Mary Jane on the cutting table every morning? Yeah, that one....) with Thor and our new little friend, Troy. I was, of course! a…

Letting My Cat Outta the Bag (idea)

2001-10-23T08:29:45Z

"The light, the heat. I am complete, I see the doorway of a thousand churches. The resolution, of all my fruitless searches." >- Peter Gabriel, In Your Eyes

Have you ever known anyone so completely, that even after years of separation, you just know what every blink and expression on their face means?Can you recognize their voice on a phone months or years after not seeing or talking to one another? Do you know what every inch of their body looks like, tastes like? Maybe I am getting ahead of myself.
Hmmmm. Yup.
I met him when I was seventeen. Brilliant, bouncy, about to take off for college, I was a rubber ball of energy with no concept of what love was, much less devotion. I knew art and I wanted adventure. Not to say it didn't take me a while after that to figure out where these feelings fit and how they work....but running straight into them was a damn good start.
He turned 22 a few weeks after we got together, (…