coby's New Writeups

Lemon Bars (thing)

2002-04-21T21:43:13Z

1 1/2 C (250 g) + 3 T Flour
2/3 C (150 ml) Confectioner's Sugar (+ extra sugar for dusting)
3/4 C (175 g) Butter or Margarine, softened
3 Eggs
1 1/2 C (300 g) Sugar
1/4 C (60 ml) Lemon Juice

___________________________

Grease 9x13 inch (23x30 cm) baking dish.

Preheat oven to 350F (180 C).

To make the crust, combine the 1 1/2 cups of flour, 2/3 cups confectioner's sugar, and butter or margarine. Press dough into the greased baking dish. Bake the crust at 350F for 20 minutes.

While the crust is baking, whisk together eggs, white sugar, 3 tablespoons of flour, and lemon juice until frothy. When crust is baked, remove from oven and pour this lemon mixture over the hot crust.Return to oven and bake at 350F for an additional 20 to 25 minutes, or until light golden brown.

When the lemon bars are cool, dust the top with confectioner's sugar. Cut into squares.

French onion soup (thing)

2001-11-25T05:40:16Z

Serves 16:

5 lbs onion (yellow, thinly sliced)
1/8 C butter
2 T olive oil
1/2 tsp sugar
2 tsp salt
1/3 C flour
3 1/2 quarts beef stock, boiling
1 1/2 C dry vermouth or dry white wine
1/3 C cognac
2 loaves french baguette (sliced 1" thick)
1 quart swiss and parmesan cheeses, coarsely grated

Simmer the onions in butter and oil for two hours. Stir frequently, and add in the sugar and salt after 15 minutes of cooking. Onions will turn a deep golden brown color.

Sprinkle on flour and cook for 5 minutes longer.

Add the boiling stock and the wine and simmer for 45 minutes longer. Skim if necessary.

Before serving, reheat to boiling, pour in the cognac. Serve in heated bowls over toasted rounds of french bread. Top with generous servings of grated parmesan and swiss cheese. If the cognac taste is too strong for you, add it…

Banana Bread (thing)

2001-11-25T04:50:06Z

This is the best banana bread recipe I've ever tasted (most likely because of the pound of sour cream):

ingredients:

3/4 C (340g) Butter or margarine
3 C (600g) Sugar
3 large eggs
6 over ripe bananas
1/2 tsp salt
4 1/2 C (630g) flour
3 tsp baking soda
16 oz. (450g) sour cream (can be low fat or non-fat)
2 tsp vanilla extract
2 tsp ground cinnamon
1 tsp ground cardamom
1 C (115g) nuts

optional mix to dust the pan:

3 T sugar
1 tsp cinnamon

Preheat oven to 300F (150C). Grease four 7x3" (17.5x7.5 cm) loaf pans, and dust lightly with cinammon and sugar mixture.

In a large bowl, cream butter and sugar. Mix in eggs, mashed bananas, sour cream, vanilla, cardamom and cinnamon. Add salt, baking soda, and flour to above mixture, and mix well. Stir in nuts. Divide into prepared pans.

Bake for one hour, or until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean.

This recipe makes a lot and can be easily halved.

April Trolls Day (idea)

2001-04-01T18:36:27Z

My favorite write-up was as follows...

If you can read this, SHUTDOWN E2 (idea) by Nanosecond

I don't know if this is an April Fools joke or something, but it seems that idiots have broken into E2. If you're a God, shutdown the site as soon as possible and fix the security hole before bring it back up. They've altered the xp system, have access to the mysql database, and are posting garbage writeups. I write this in a writeup because I am borged and cannot communicate.

I hope the gods intervene....

woleb ti daer dluoc uoy os sdrowkcab ti detsoper I os ,sdrawkcab txet eht edam yehT

etacinummoc tonnac dna degrob ma I esuaceb puetirw a ni siht etirw I .spuetirw egabrag gnitsop era dna ,esabatad lqsym eht ot ssecca evah ,metsys px eht deretla ev'yehT .pu kcab ti gnirb erofeb eloh ytiruces eht xif dna elbissop sa noos sa etis eht nwodtuhs ,]doG a er'uoy fI .2E otni nekorb evah stoidi taht smees ti tub ,gnihtemos ro ekoj slooF lirpA na si siht fi wonk t'nod I

…

cellular telephone as a weapon (idea)

2001-03-28T16:22:38Z

A friend of mine works at a legal aid clinic that serves indigent people on Chicago's South Side. One of her cases involves a woman who was harassed and beaten by the police on a number of occasions. Sounds like a great case for a litigator, right? Sort of...

The thing about people who are harassed and beaten by the cops is, they generally don't make the best plaintiffs. By that, I mean that the cops rarely harass and beat people like me (white law students who drive nice cars). The woman in this case was black and had a criminal history (mainly drugs and prostitution). In these situations, it is almost always the cop's word against the black junkie prostitute who stands to get a BIG section 1983 award, and who do you think a jury is likely to believe?

But this case was different. When the cop began to harass her, the woman managed to dial into her voice mail using her cell phone, which recorded the event. With the audio tape, this woman's chances in court improve…

Earth shattering orgasms (thing)

2001-03-25T18:17:11Z

It starts with a touch.

The touch pulses.

The pulse beats.

Beats.

Then a spark to bone-dry underbrush.

Then a word to a riot-verging crowd.

Then a hammer strikes a crystal ball.

And all that's left is the price of the ticket.

Or as defined by Svaha...

Muscles contract.
Release.
The universe aligns. Angels sing.
Wet. Wetter. Union.
Harmony.
The Self disintergrates into millions of pulses of energy.
The body hums.
The soul reverberates.

Generally acquired from people whose unique ability to devote attention to small details can make immense things happen, such as, but not limited to: programmers and artists. Acquisition method: sex and in very rare moments…