http://everything2.com/?node=New%20Writeups%20Atom%20Feed&foruser=Erik Killblood 2012-06-01T08:07:48Z http://everything2.com/user/Erik+Killblood/writeups/The+Epic+Epic+of+Erik+%2527The+Epic%2527+KillbloodErik Killbloodhttp://everything2.com/user/Erik Killblood2012-06-01T08:07:48Z2012-06-01T08:07:48Z <p>I woke up to the sound of explosions and knew instantly that the <a href="/title/Daspletosaurus">Daspletosaurus</a>es were back, and they'd brought their <a href="/title/rocket+launchers">rocket launchers</a>.</p> <p>I rolled out of my bivouac, my <a href="/title/BFG90001">BFG90001</a> (which I sleep with loaded and with the safety off in case something like this happens) already ready and started blasting grapefruit sized blasts of pure condensed 100% flaming whup ass encased in Teflon and fuck-up-your-morning-suckas at the dozen dinos stampeding for my camp.</p> <p>The air filled with the screams of dinosaurs screaming in pain, my own laughter, and that weird splotching-spleltching sound you get when grapefruit sized blasts of condensed 100% flaming whup ass encased in Teflon and fuck-up-your-morning-suckas take grapefruit-sized chunks out of dinosaurs.</p> <p>It was <a href="/title/totally+radical">totally radical</a>. At the end I was soaked in green blood (don't let those stuffed up paleontologists tell you otherwise, dinosaurs bleed green, bizzatches) and surrounded by dead Daspletosauruses. I looked around and saw that their&hellip;