the back roads

When asked to describe the exact path of the back roads, a dominant male will usually mumble something about "the boondocks" with a glimmer in his eye.

My limited experience of American roads has shown that even back roads are straight with 90 degree bends when they want to turn.. For anybody who hasn't driven on British back roads they twist and turn constantly - mainly because they follow the paths that were created by drunken horse and carts oh so long ago. In fact, straight roads are a positive novelty in that they only exist where the Romans built them (My, those Romans were clever). Anyway, I digress...

Considering the lack of cruise control in Britain it is a known fact that driving on a motorway is positively boring and tiring on the accelerator foot because it has to be held at a certain point for hours on end. Thats why back roads are fun - they present an ever changing scenery - a challenge!!

I suppose this has been exacerbated by the sudden popularity of rally driving because when I am driving down a country lane it is as though I am Colin Mcrae in a Subaru Impreza Turbo: Power down the straight... "Hard Right, Left!" .. clutch down, into 3rd, blip the accelerator and take the first corner beautifully. Change up one to power around the second ..... "Twat in a BMW the size of a tank"...... foot down until right up behind him so he knows who's boss. He may have 4 litres of engine but his car handles like a cruise liner. Then you hear the call "Easy left, long straight". Ease off the gas, change down one to get the revs into the power band then nail it!

by the time he has realised that there is a straight you are back up his arse and 10 miles an hour faster, you swerve out and completely humiliate the self important bastard who would have left you for dust on the motorway.....wonderful stuff!!!

Well, that's why I take the back roads...

This node was brought to you by testosterone, shell petrol and my car

Don't let Uberfetus kid you, you don't have to acquire knowledge of the back roads from your father. Your motorcyclist friend doubtless knows of the twistiest, longest, most redundant roads to nowhere within a days ride. (s)he probably rode along at least one of them last weekend and will do so again next weekend.

Upon acquiring their first motorcycle and a minimal level of competence, a motorcyclist will be drawn to the nearest such road by a mechanism that remains mysterious to this day but probably involves disturbances in the earths magnetic field created by the bends in the road. My theory is that the traffic upon the road, being made largely of metal, crosses lines of magnetic flux creating a miniscule disturbance that can nonetheless be detected subconsciously by motorcyclists in much the same way that pigeons find their way home

Upon any given weekend, they can be found risking life and limb is search of the perfect line. Sometimes singly and at other times in groups, motorcyclists flock to back roads not on their way to a destination but because such roads are their destination. A means and an end in itself.

Here's to back roads! the twistier the better.