desperation

When I was about 13 years old or so, Capcom, a popular video game company, was releasing Street Fighter 2 for the Super Nintendo. I loved this game in the arcades and decided I must have it for my own.

So I started doing odd chores around the house and even whored myself out to everyone in the neighborhood, asking them if they needed their yard swept, lawn mowed, or pool skimmed. By the time the game was released, I didn't have enough money. Being 13 and stupid, I started to panic.

I went rummaging through my parent's drawers and sister's drawers and finally found a $50 bill in my sister's room. Now, I had never stolen anything in my entire life, but something inside told me I had to get this game and do whatever I have to do to get it. So I took it.

Now the part came where I had to think up a story to tell my parents about how I got the money... being young, dumb, and lame, I decided to tell them that someone just put it on the street and included a note (which I wrote, sloppily) that said "Here, this is for the game."

Of course they didn't buy it for one second, but that didn't stop me from continuing to lie about it for a good two days... But by the time I cracked, they had lost almost all respect for me and grounded me for a long time.

I don't know why I went so apeshit about a stupid video game. I guess maybe it's because I was addicted... Now I know exactly what it feels like when you're a junkie and don't have enough money for your fix.

Important life experience gained.

Des`per*a"tion (?), n. [L. desperatio: cf. OF. desperation.]

1.

The act of despairing or becoming desperate; a giving up of hope.

This desperation of success chills all our industry. Hammond.

2.

A state of despair, or utter hopeless; abandonment of hope; extreme recklessness; reckless fury.

In the desperation of the moment, the officers even tried to cut their way through with their swords. W. Irving.

© Webster 1913.