Everything2
Near Matches
Ignore Exact
Full Text
Everything2

The Lion, The Other Lion and the Kipper

created by fondue

(idea) by fondue (1.6 hr) (print)   ?   5 C!s I like it! Mon Feb 28 2000 at 15:42:20

from Aesop's Fables

Once, a lion (Lion) was roaming through the jungle. It came upon a clearing (messy), where it found another lion (The Other Lion). Now, each one of these lions thought themselves to be the king of beasts, in the metaphorical / symbolic sense. But which of the lions was truly the king? To see who was the best, the two lions waded into the stream (oh yeah, there was a stream in the clearing). As lions have done since before the dawn of time (18th May, 1000 BTDOT, to be precise), they fixed each other in a steely gaze, put forward a glossy paw and extended their non-opposable, pad-like thumbs. At this point, both lions realised that a thumb war was not only inappropriate but physically impossible for lions. As they stood, three legs down, one forward, in the stream, as the sun began to set, a kipper swam between them through the water. Both of the lions immediately forgot their struggle and leapt for the kipper. The kipper, however, being a smoked fish, leapt out of the water and eluded them. So both the lions remained hungry until one of the lions, now clearly a computer-generated comedy lion, pushed aside some creepers and revealed a Pizza Hut restaurant. Everybody shouted hooray.

The moral of this story is Deep Pan Ultra Thick Cheeze Crust, only $1.99.

Next week , Aesop's gazelles wearing Hilfiger tops....

printable version
chaos

Aesop's Fables Remember, remember the fourth of Nodevember Generic stand up comedy routine Hey, we're Pizza Hut! We've put cheese in places you've never even dreamed of!
Top of the morning to you Kipper Foible I cried when he threw away the paper towel on top of the microwave
Rapunzel Nuke the unborn gay baby whales for Jesus deep fried pizza Bag of Crushed Child
common sense LSD The Cowardly Lion and the Hungry Tiger Lion of Foo
Divine Comedy The truth is like a sinking star. Follow it over the horizon, the way gazelles follow rain. October 30, 2007 The Doe and the Lion
The Sick Lion The Lion, Jupiter, and the Elephant The Lion and the Jewel The Lion, the Bear, and the Fox
Y'know, if you log in, you can write something here, or contact authors directly on the site. Create a New User if you don't already have an account.
  Epicenter
Login
Password

password reminder
register

Everything2 Help


cooled by knifegirl

Cool Staff Picks
Just another sprinkling of indeterminacy
Two Gentlemen on Veronica
Comet Hale-Bopp
Nathaniel Hawthorne
i sing of Olaf glad and big
Anacletus
Electrical outlet
Bay leaf
The Lindisfarne Gospels
philodendron
Lawrence Textile Strike
I can make you howl. And vice versa. Let's get down to business.
CIA World Factbook - Hell
There's nothing noble about being a soldier
New Writeups
Ouzo
Goodwill Hunting, Thrift Store(ies)(log)
Pandeism Fish
How conatus compels divine ketosis through a radical kenosis(essay)
cryforhelp
Major dictionaries of the world(review)
Glowing Fish
The Uncanny X-Men and the New Teen Titans(thing)
WolfKeeper
Launch loop(idea)
TendoKing
Katana(person)
Wuukiee
Highly ornamental cultivars of brambles still have as many thorns as their wild counterparts(idea)
TheDeadGuy
Editor Log: May 2008(log)
everyday j.Lo
pray do not molest them(thing)
ammie
Bands Who Take Their Names from Eighteenth-century English Poetry and Prose(idea)
shaogo
Under My Thumb(review)
ammie
Rock On(person)
The Custodian
The Dresden Files(thing)
Ouzo
PETA becomes you, a proposed future(fiction)
Ereneta
Stone Soup, Part Two(fiction)
Everything 2 is brought to you by the letter C and The Everything Development Company