The Howard Stern Women

created by gahachino

(idea) by gahachino (5.8 mon) (print) ? (I like it!) 1 C! Tue Oct 24 2000 at 3:53:27

Howard Stern hosts a show on E!, probably called The Howard Stern Show, which appears to showcase women who want Howard Stern to cajole them into their underpants and then comment on their bodies.

The Howard Stern Women disturb me. They are young and old, fat and thin, famous and not so well known. There are a plethora of strippers and porn stars who show up there along with midwestern housewives looking to have Howard comment on their breasts.

Can someone explain this to me? I am completely clueless as to why all of these women would treat this guy like the most important judge at the Miss America pageant. You aren't going to win anything. If it's a famous woman, or a porn star, he gushes on and on about how fabulous and beautiful the woman is, while she sits on a bench with these massive ear muffs on, giggling to accentuate her shiny pink lipstick and perfectly white teeth. The strippers fare worse, they invariably end up mostly naked while they are rated for their tits and ass.

"Those are wonderful breasts. Are those real? Get out of here!! How long have you been dancing? Yeah, your knees are pretty banged up, maybe you should do something about that ass."

What confuses me the most are the random women, the 19 year old girls looking for affirmation, and the housewives. They come into this studio, mullet-haired husband or frumpy cousin in tow, with their white shoes and floral dresses.

"Howard, we love you. Do you think I should get a boob job?"

Who gives a care about what some talk radio host thinks about your boobs?? What do you think about them?? Howard says go for the silicone ones, they're firmer. While you're at it, why don't you take care of that belly, it's a little saggy. Howard also thinks that floral print dresses are ugly, how about you quit wearing them? Howard's favorite actresses all have auburn hair. Let's do something about that dishwater blonde. Perhaps what these women need is a book to be published called "Howard Says." It would contain all of the preferences of Howard Stern, so that these women wouldn't have to visit the show in order to find out what they didn't really want to know in the first place.

printable version
chaos

Jenna Jameson	Ewww, icky boob job!	blonde female teen pop tart	Howard Stern
Why can't whites use the word "nigger?"	Patricia Ford	Mullet	Hank, the Angry, Drunken Dwarf
What is wrong with my breasts?	Kill Your Television	breasts	breast implants
blondes have more fun	peroxide blonde	On the Air Because They Care	Pig
God Bless You, Dr. Kevorkian	Oh look, breasts	underpants	Porn Star
Bodies	Nena	Mark Cuban	How to kill, pluck and dress a chicken

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