The Anime Laws of Physics

First Corollary -
 

Anything that explodes bulges first.

Large cities are the most explosive substances known to human science. Tokyo in particular seems to be the most unstable of these cities, sometimes referred to as "The Matchstick City".

First Corollary -
 

Small and cute will always overcome big and ugly. Also known as the A-Ko phenomenon.

First Corollary -
 

The more 'Bad Guys' there are, the less likely they will hit anyone or do any real damage.

Whenever a 'Good Guy' is faced with insurmountable odds, the 'Bad Guys' line up in neat rows, allowing the hero to take them all out with a single burst of automatic fire and then escape.

Whenever a 'Good Guy' is actually hit by enemy fire, it is in a designated 'Good Guy Area', usually a flesh wound in the shoulder or arm, which restricts the 'Good Guy' from doing anything more strenuous than driving, firing weaponry, using melee weapons, operating heavy machinery, or doing complex martial arts maneuvers.

First Corollary -
(from Adam Barnes)
 

Whenever a single war machine (mecha, starship, etc.) goes up against an entire army, the army always loses.

First Corollary -
 

The only people who are more stupid than the big dumb Americans are the American translators. (Sometimes referred to as the Green Line Effect)

The only people who are more stupid than the American translators are the American editors and censors.

1) be female
2) will possess ears and sometimes a tail as a genetic mutation
3) wear as little clothing as possible, if any

Female characters wear as little clothing as possible, regardless of whether it is socially or meteorologically appropriate. Any female with an excessive amount of clothing will invariably have her clothes ripped to shreds or torn off somehow. If there is no opportunity to tear off the afore-mentioned female's clothes, then she will inexplicably take a shower for no apparent reason (also known as the Gratuitous Shower Scene).

Whenever there is a headwind, Male characters invariably wear a long cloaks that don't hamper movement and billow out dramatically behind them.

First Corollary (Cryo-Adaptability) -
 

All anime characters are resistant to extremely cold temperatures, and do not need to wear heavy or warm clothing in snow.

Bikinis render the wearer invulnerable to any form of damage.

1) The Hero/Leader
2) His Girlfriend
3) His Best Friend/Rival
4) A Hulking Brute
5) A Dwarf/Kid

1) Extreme Coolness
2) Amazing Intelligence
3) Incredible Irritation

First Corollary (a.k.a. The Hammer Rule) -
(from Ferdinand Pelayo)
 

The most common item stored is a heavy mallet, which can be used with unerring accuracy on any male who deserves it. Other common items include costumes/uniforms, power suits/armor, and large bazookas.

First Corollary -
 

Unfortunately, this law seems to apply to Otaku in the real world...