Fundamentalist Christian Whacko with passions for the King James Version of the Bible, end times theology, money, numerology, the New World Order, conspiracy theories, shabby scholarship, and, most importantly, himself.

Marrs lives in Austin, Texas, where he runs organizations called the RiverCrest Publishing, Bible Home Church, and Power of Prophesy Ministries. He is a retired Air Force officer, a former professor of aerospace studies at the University of Texas, the author of over 40 books (including "Circle of Intrigue", "Project L.U.C.I.D.", "Dark Majesty: The Secret Brotherhood and the Magic of a Thousand Points of Light", "New Age Cults and Religions", "Millennium: Peace, Promises, and the Day They Take Our Money Away", "Days of Hunger, Days of Chaos", and the heroically-titled "Big Sister is Watching You: Hillary Clinton and the White House Feminists Who Now Control America--And Tell the President What to Do"), and a frequent guest on radio and TV talk shows.

Marrs is funny. No, really, he is. Some fundies are scary, but I can always find something worth laughing at in the stuff Texe writes. He's a member of the "KJV Only" movement and frequently proclaims that anyone who reads a version of the Bible other than the King James Version is (A) a homosexual, (B) a feminist, (C) a devil worshiper, and (D) going straight to Hell. He has speculated about whether NASA suppressed evidence of dinosaur and giant squid fossils on the moon. He considers Barbie to be the Whore of Babylon and believes that wolves are being reintroduced into Yellowstone National Park so that they will kill and eat all the tourists.

Marrs has denounced Billy Graham, Hal Lindsey, and Jack Van Impe for not hating Catholics, Pat Robertson for letting a 33rd-degree Mason speak at a conference, Pat Boone for making a jokey heavy metal album, Oliver North because his Virginia farm is supposedly situated over FEMA's secret underground bunkers, Senator Jesse Helms for hugging Secretary of State Madeleine Albright, and the John Birch Society for disliking Texe Marrs (and the Birchers aren't alone--I found a metric Guatamalan ton of fundamentalist Christian websites that had harsh words for ol' Texe). He despises the IRS, probably because they busted him for mismanaging church funds.

And Texe's books are filled with footnotes citing himself as a source--a scholarly blunder that would get him flunked out of high school English class. His conspiracy theories are unoriginal (the usual anti-Jew, anti-banker, anti-Bilderbergers, anti-Freemasons, anti-Catholic stuff that plagues most weak conspiracy theories) and contradictory ("Circle of Intrigue" features a lengthy list of diabolical conspirators from every corner of the political spectrum, from Rush Limbaugh and Vladimir Zhirinovsky to Jesse Helms and Jesse Jackson--it's entertaining, but a complete mishmash).

More good laughs can be had by visiting www.texemarrs.com.

It is my fond desire that Texe will prominently denounce me someday for writing this.