| Perhaps you don't actually care about the subjunctive. That's OK, and even fairly likely. Move along then, there's nothing here to see. If, however, it just drives you insane to hear someone crooning about what would happen "if God was one of us", then here's a node submitted for your approval. I've started cataloguing all those songs which willfully abuse the subjunctive. Here they are, for all you militant grammarians. This is one of those nodes I've been waiting a long time to create (and now that I've found E2, I have purged this knowledge from my tortured mind). It will grow as my recollection of previous offenders freshens up a bit. For now, here are the whiniest, most prominent subjunctive mood abusing songs I can think of (in the english language, of course):
Joan Osborne : One of Us : What if god was one of us? ...
Sophie B. Hawkins : Damn I Wish I Was Your Lover : Damn, I wish I was your lover...
Counting Crows : Mr. Jones : I wish I was beauftiful...
Natalie Imbruglia : Wishing I Was There : wishing I, wishing I was there...
Pearl Jam : Wishlist : I wish I was a neutron bomb...
Nirvana : All Apologies : I wish I was like you, easily amused...
Christina Aguilera : Somebody's Somebody : I wish I was somebody's baby...
Radiohead : Creep : I wish I was special, you're so fucking special...
The Mighty Mighty Bosstones : The Impression That I Get : I'd like to think if I was I would pass...
Eagle Eye Cherry: Stay Tonight : Lord I wish it wasn't so
Joydrop: Beautiful : If I was beautiful like you
Pet Shop Boys: I'm not scared : If I was you I wouldn't treat me the way you do
The Doors: Light my Fire : If I was to say to you
girl we couldn't get much higher
Skee-Lo: I Wish : I wish I was a little bit taller
Dave Matthews Band: Fool to Think : as if I was yours
The Cure: Close to me : If only I was sure
Simon and Garfunkel: Homeward Bound : homeward bound, I wish I was homeward bound...
And the grandmommy of them all, the only song with guaranteed proof that the author is deliberately and wilfully abusing the subjunctive,
Loudon Wainwright III: I Wish I Was A Lesbian : Okay, so I'm riding around in this car with this woman I drive to work with a couple times a week. And I'm noticing she's looking out the window and checking out other women. How their hair looks, what a nice outfit, how round their ass is, and I said "Hey, babe! What's the deal? You're noticing all these other chicks! Maybe... you're a lesbian". She looks at me and says "I wish I was a lesbian". Now at that point I wanted to say "You mean you wish you were a lesbian, 'cause grammatically..." But I let it slide, I didn't want to ruffle any feathers... But you know, that sentence, that rhetort, "I wish I was a lesbian", huh, it kinda got stuck in my mind, kinda gestated there for 7 or 8 minutes, and this tune popped out!
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