Sex just walked by me, and I didn't get any, dammit

Dating today sucks. I suppose it's better than a couple centuries ago, where constant supervision when in the company of the opposite sex was requisite, but nevertheless, dating today sucks. One night, a relatively attractive man approached me at a bar and proceeded to inform me that I had the nicest ass of anyone he had ever seen (something I like to agree with). Whether or not he was telling the truth, he was blunt and straightforward and got to grab that ass while we danced, along with my phone number at the end of the night. That poor sap who tried cheesy pick-up lines and meekly attempted to start an intelligent conversation (something which doesn't work very well when one is unintelligent, drunk and in a bar at two in the morning) was sipping Bud by himself at the end of the night, despite the fact that he was much more attractive than Blunt Man.

Message to all men: harden your shell and be prepared to get shot down by those who don't appreciate what I am proposing, but many women greatly appreciate bluntness, and if a handsome face and good personality come with it, you're getting some ass tonight, my friend.

Not that this happens often, but when a guy who I just met or barely know tells me that Im beautiful, or have a nice smile/eyes/fill in the blank, I can see right through him. I know that he probably wants to get into my pants, and is trying every conceivable tactic to make that happen. Maybe its not just me, maybe Im just the first half decent looking girl he saw behind his shot glass, or was the first one to walk into the room with a skirt on. Whatever the case, guys are horny, and all of us know it. So why does it matter if the guy has a slightly wittier come-on or just a cheesy pick-up, they have the same intention, and just because someone isn't good with their words doesnt mean that they wont be good in bed.

However for some women, neither kind of guy works. I personally want a guy that will sit next to me, buy me a drink, ask me how Im doing and the like, and be considerate enough to call a cab for me when Im too drunk to even walk home. I dont care if a guy tells me that I have a nice ass, I know I have a nice ass. Sorry, but no way in hell is any guy like that going to take me home tonight.

Thank you, ladies, for your effective (if accidental) demonstration of how everyone is different.

In reality, it doesn't matter if you think you know the lines, the moves, or what women want. Women are different; and they want different things, appreciate different moves, and respond to different lines. That's why that saying as old as teen drama, "Be yourself" has any validity at all.

Don't misunderstand. It's not because you're hot shit underneath all of that superficiality. Contrary to popular belief, you have no particular charm, and you aren't special. You're just different. And you're bound to be someone's kind of different.

So, why waste time? Whether or not you're going to get yourself a tasty boosh is entirely dependent on random circumstances outside your control. Honestly: some women like mean guys, some like sensitive ones. Some like mean guys who are sensitive at heart but act tough because they just can't handle emotional connection. Some women don't like guys at all.

The point is, in all likeliness, the chances any personality you assume will attract women are exactly the same as the chances that your "normal" personality will get you laid. But don't take my word for it! Give it a shot yourself, and tell me if you aren't getting exactly as much action as you were before, but with a tenth of the effort.