Putting a match out in your mouth

• Your tongue is flexible, so smash it as far down as you are capable of getting it. ( Or pull it as far back as you can.) That way you can put the match towards the bottom of your mouth to avoid the flame from licking the roof of your mouth.


• DO NOT flinch when you put the match in your mouth. Not only will you end up hurting yourself, but you don't look as cool when you're flinching.
  
• If you do end up hitting your mouth, it will be sore for a few days, but no fear, you will heal.
  
• I do not recommend doing this with matches out of match books, at least until you've gotten the trick down. Especially if the match is still in the book. The match will be harder to control, so you might end up burning yourself.

My method of doing this doesn't involve as much risk of first-degree burn, it still looks just as cool though.

While putting the match in your mouth, slowly let out a deep breath. As you put it in your mouth close your lips together. This will increase the speed of the air flowing over the flame. By the time you close your mouth, the flame should be out. It will still have a burning ember, and you should keep your mouth closed until that goes out. This will give you a decent mouthful of smoke, thus completing the illusion.

Congratulations, you are now the envy of all your drunk ass/easily impressed friends at your next party.

See also: How to blow smoke rings

Next week on "Stupid Shit to do with Fire" lighting farts, brought to you by the good folks at meffy2k Productions.

We hope you enjoy the show.

Standard disclaimer

• When you light a match, the head flares up. It then dies down, and the wood stick catches. The flame then spreads down the stick, making the little fire longer and hotter. Learn to recognise the fire's weakest time when the head has died down, but not much of the shaft is burning yet. The match should pass your lips around this point, which means it's still flaring impressively when you flourish it just before that.
• Take a deep breath, hold it a bit until it's stale and low in oxygen. As you bring the match up, exhale a bit so your mouth is full of low-oxygen air. The slight draft doesn't hurt either.
• Don't touch the burning matchhead with any part of your mouth. Get your tounge out of the way and keep the match low.
• Close your mouth, airtight. Do not breath through your nose. Close your throat. The match will run out of oxygen in a few seconds.
• Don't panic if the roof of your mouth gets hot. This means you didn't do it just right, but all is not lost. The match runs out of air very soon, and your mouth will only be tender for a day. Keep a straight face.
• Keep your mouth closed for five seconds or so even though the match may go out faster than that. Build suspense.
• You don't need a good fire to make smoke - in fact, fires that are not buring well make the most smoke. Open your mouth and exhale a mouthfull of white fumes.