| As a sort-of-wannabe-Osaka native, I take offense at these stereotypes, and wish to refute them thusly:
Osakans are all yakuza. This is analogous to a New Yorker saying that everyone in New Jersey is in the Mafia. (Well, okay, maybe that's a bad comparison).
Osakans wear shoes in their houses. They don't. Not even when they move to the US. Any more wrong ideas, Kanto-kisser?
Osakans all walk on the wrong side of the escalator. No, Tokyoans all walk on the wrong side. In every country I've ever been to, you walk on the same side you would drive on. For Japan, this would logically be the left. Therefore, Tokyo is at fault here, not Osaka.
Their Kansai dialect is grammatically wrong, and they should speak the Tokyo dialect. You know, Kansai dialect was never "wrong" until Tokyo became the capital. At any rate, Tokyo's dialect is one of the blandest, most boring spoken languages I've ever heard. It reminds me of being in South Dakota. I listen to a person from Tokyo and wonder, "When are they going to say 'don'cha know?'" Then I hear Osakans speak, and they all sound enthused and invigorating.
Osakans speak too loud. That's so you can HEAR them! Jeez. You think that the right way to talk is to mumble all your words like Utada Hikaru voicing the girl from Black Jack? Puh-leeze.
Osakans are very rude in speech and mannerisms. Maybe if you don't understand the dialect. On the flip side, I was short-changed three times in a row the first time I went to Tokyo. Now tell me that Osakans are rude.
Osakans speak in a tone that sounds like they are angry. Seeing as you're a Tokyo native, it's probably because you're pissing them off with all your radical ideas about Osaka natives being rude that have already occurred to others, who were dipped in okonomiyaki sauce and dumped in the Dotombori.
Conversations between Osakans always sound like a manzai comedy routine by the way they frequently use tsukkomi and boke. Conversations between Tokyoans, on the other hand, sound like a political discussion on NHK, and tend to lead to narcolepsy.
Still can't get over that fact that the forces of Tokugawa Ieyasu beat Hideyori Toyotomi in the summer war of Osaka of 1615 without saying that he cheated. Um... how many years ago did you make this observation?
Osakans are all die-hard Hanshin Tigers fans. At least they aren't lukewarm Yomiuri Giants fans like everyone in Tokyo. The Giants make the New York Yankees look like fair competition. And hey, if any team in Tokyo had a fight song as cool as Rokko Oroshi, you'd be a die-hard fan, too. | 
