Everything2
Near Matches
Ignore Exact
Full Text
Everything2

My parents conspire to make me a porn star

created by prole

(idea) by prole (1.3 wk) (print)   ?   (I like it!) 1 C! Sat Sep 30 2000 at 4:04:05

actually, for purposes of this writeup, it's just my dad. we won't go into the various examples set by both of them.

the conversation went like this:

dad: one of the guys from work got this internet video camera. he says it's really neat.
prole: you mean a webcam, dad?
dad: yeah. you use it to see people over the internet?
prole: oh. ok..
dad: anyway, he was really excited about it, so i went out and bought us some. (at this point it's necessary to explain that after living very frugally for ten to fifteen years, my dad acquired a large sum of money as worker's compensation. so he's now given to infrequent flights of frivolousness.)
prole: us who?
dad: all of us. so i need to get your address.

what can we deduce from this? principally, that my dad has no faith in my ability to support myself with my intellect alone, and thinks it would be wiser for me to combine a device for broadcasting images over the web with my not inconsiderable knowledge of photoshop in order to attain food, shelter, and the like. this is all because my little sister has made it her business to show me up to such an extreme that the scope of her accomplishments makes me look like a vegetable in comparison. her getting a webcam too is just my dad's clever ploy to disguise his motives.

i used to be the good daughter. sigh.

printable version
chaos

Recognizing a porn star as someone you know Rules for trading pictures on the Internet Your superior intellect is no match for our puny weapons Adventures in the women's bathroom : A male perspective
My mother and two Rastafarians My washcloth is like my vagina Good old fashioned fucking The Three Fine Daughters of Farmer Brown
Giving a woman a handjob Elephant penis joke For entertainment purposes only prole
Kill time before it kills you Shakespeare is like sex: A beginner's guide Jewish Lesbian Daughters of Holocaust Survivors What It Feels Like for a Girl
The sequel to Se7en Quotes from sleeping people theoretical physics Porn Star
Live fast die young leave a good looking corpse The time my father caught me having sex Avril Lavigne Peter North
Y'know, if you log in, you can write something here, or contact authors directly on the site. Create a New User if you don't already have an account.
  Epicenter
Login
Password

password reminder
register

Everything2 Help

Cool Staff Picks
Nodes your cousin would have liked:
The Phantom of the Opera
The Hours
borscht
Wildfire
Timur
The Michigan PBB disaster
Orientalism
Lineage of Jesus
Terence, This Is Stupid Stuff
fairy ring
Malhavoc
North American Poetry
Grendel
New Writeups
antigravpussy
One fly amonst many(person)
sam512
Moon Base Shackleton, 1978(fiction)
Pavlovna
toy boy(person)
XWiz
tear jerker(review)
Heitah
Anarchy is Order(idea)
jessicaj
July 26, 2008(dream)
Berek
ABBA(person)
devolution
k-hole(place)
Nadine_2
The Sound Of Madness(review)
Twin Eclipse
Conversations with God: An Uncommon Dialogue(idea)
SwimmingMonkey
Conversations with Fo Fo- the Loneliest dog in Purgatory(fiction)
locke baron
lynx(thing)
Simulacron3
Reality, Dimensions and the Natural Ontology(essay)
SubSane
Making Love to a 9-Foot Woman(person)
Ouzo
Thoughts(idea)
This page courtesy of The Everything Development Company