I have pushed many humans I have shoved many more

created by Mr. Hotel

(person) by Scout Finch (6.5 d) (print) ? (I like it!) 7 C!s Thu Nov 10 2005 at 19:39:32

I have fallen many times. Out of trees, over curbs, on rocks, in love, out of love, off of swings, in drunken stupors, in public, in the dark.

I have found people that make me trip over myself, make me look like I never learned to walk at all.

Look, I have found myself dealing with love many times. In love and at love and over love and out of love. It's like a string I pull behind me and weave throughout all the experiences in my life. In and out, in and out. Under bridges and over mountains and around in circles, spinning. Plaiting a lifetime of experiences around this string.

For as many people as I have caught in this string; for all the people that I have knitted and tied up with this string--there are many more that are never included.

Maybe it was the man behind the counter at the bagel store. Big brown eyes and thick eyebrows. Handsome and charming. I could have wound him up right then and there, pulled him in and strung him up. I didn't. I can't tell you why.

Or maybe the boy in my college literature class who was constantly asking me out for coffee.

Or the girl in high school who knew many things about me long before I had even dreamed of figuring them out. Who wanted to pull me in close and wrap me up in her own string but I pushed her away.

There was the guy from the gym--pushed. The girl working as a fast food register jockey--pushed. The boy at the bar all those Friday nights--pushed. The supermarket girl--pushed.

Sometimes I don't even want to push these people away. But it's like I walk around with my arms all extended, waiting for prey. Sometimes I catch people in my arms and wrap them up as if they were an insect on my spider web. Other times I use those arms for pushing; for shoving. Just push them away. Away and far enough away that I don't have to worry about it hurting me any.

I was already predisposed to pushing when I met Kate. I was used to it. I hadn't used the string in years except for places, objects, memories, pieces. No humans in the web anymore, okay?

But there she was, all whispers and pinecones and smiles. My arms were no match when it comes to pushing away beauty. So I didn't push this time. I didn't even try.

I wound her up in string and handed her the end.

I said, here is my string, give it a tug. Unravel this scarf, this blanket, this life, this heart I've been making. Unravel it and leave the string dangling because it doesn't have to matter anymore.

And she did.

printable version
chaos

Charlotte, who, like a lot of low-maintenance women, cannot tell a lie, said, Yes.	The Terrible Secret of Space	It doesn't get any better than this	Terminating a pregnancy due to Down Syndrome
a woman with sea-green eyes	We have always lived in the castle, Shirley	I never ventured in the woods and got drunk and slept	sometimes, people are more than just OK
Because it is bitter and because it is my heart	Forget what you think you know about the opposite sex	The boys did not know it. They were just being beautiful, and I got to watch.	leaving out parts of the truth. you have to.
I have to believe that the truth will eventually pay off	what we call human nature is actually human habit	Why do we always whisper in the dark?	Don't ever forget that I listened to you out of love
I'm in Love with a Girl Named Spike	I dreamed of fire. I dreamed of floods.	a smiling girl with blonde eyelashes and a sundress. someday i'll find her	spider camp
i can tell you the dreaming up north is real and wide	I would have leapt at the innuendo you had strewn at my feet.	Bitch: In Praise of Difficult Women	Commit to paper the chances I've missed, the girls I've loved, the dogs I've kissed

Y'know, if you log in, you can write something here, or contact authors directly on the site. Create a New User if you don't already have an account.

Login
Password

remember me
password reminder
register

Everything2 Help

Nodes your grandpa would have liked:
test5
Terminator
Samuel Johnson
Jane's Fighting Nodes
Tricks of the Propagandist
Grateful Dead lyrics
Tamal
Napoleon Bonaparte
Why do some people enjoy being in nature?
Bikram Yoga
Lorelei
Happy Pizza
Brian Eno Random Node Conspiracy

antigravpussy
One fly amongst many	(person)
sam512
Moon Base Shackleton, 1978	(fiction)
Pavlovna
toy boy	(person)
XWiz
tear jerker	(review)
Heitah
Anarchy is Order	(idea)
jessicaj
July 26, 2008	(dream)
Berek
ABBA	(person)
devolution
k-hole	(place)
Nadine_2
The Sound Of Madness	(review)
SwimmingMonkey
Conversations with Fo Fo, the Loneliest dog in Purgatory	(fiction)
locke baron
lynx	(thing)
Simulacron3
Reality, Dimensions and the Natural Ontology	(essay)
SubSane
Making Love to a 9-Foot Woman	(person)
Ouzo
Thoughts	(idea)
antigravpussy
I fall silent, listening. The breadcrumbs are talking about us	(person)

Everything 2 is brought to you by the letter C and The Everything Development Company