There are so many layers to you so many sides
thoughts
emotions
fears
desires
All the pieces that make up who you are somehow do not yet understand that they serve a single entity.
Twist and tug, each wanting to outdo the other, wrestling for control
Is that what it's about
Is this what the tears and the poems and the drugs and the friends are supposed to do? Give you control?
Rearrange the chaotic chips and shards and edges into something crystalline malleable
only by your desire?
Were I to visit you in a dream
you might not be afraid
and we might be able to see all this
and smile about it
and slowly bring it all together and
light would bow before your fancies knowing at last something
greater then itself
But your dreams I cannot visit and these things I cannot know
I see you in hyperbursts of inspiration so fleeting I know of them only in memories and tears I cannot otherwise explain
Is this how you know yourself? Could it be that from your vantage point the absolute intimacy serves only to overwhelm? Perhaps we should trade places for a time and share newly whispered secrets. Would we understand
together, or would we lose ourselves in the beauty? | 
