How I nearly killed myself masturbating

created by Katyana

(idea) by Katyana (5.8 d) (print) ? 4 C!s I like it! Mon Jun 05 2000 at 19:38:19

Apparently, women have known the wonders of a bathtub faucet through the ages. The secret is to scoot your bum underneath the faucet and let the hot water wash over your clit. A friend of mine told me this is the only way she masturbates. I decided to give it the old college try.
In case you haven't tried it, I do recommend it. However, do proceed with caution. Your backside is covering the drain, and a lethal amount of water can build up in the tub. The first time I tried this I came so hard that my entire body shut down. Still in the midst of orgasm, my head was under water and I gasped for air.
Although the Marquis De Sade recommends asphyxiation during sex, I had no desire to try that one. Yay, though it did add that element of excitement, what an embarrassing eulogy that would be.

(thing) by Jamyn (1.1 y) (print) ? 1 C! I like it! Fri Jun 16 2000 at 6:13:46

Asphyxiation is a very interesting thing to do during sex. I'll admit, given the right circumstances, it really does heighten the experience. The key is to find someone who is as willing to try it as you are. If the partner is not into it, then it's pointless. That said, asphyxiation is not about trying to freaking kill the one you're having sex with, its about depriving your partner of oxygen to the brain for a short period of time, right before they get off. To be honest, I never really got into the "ok, now I'm going to choke you until you almost pass out while we're having sex, and then you do it to me.." type of thing. I was curious about all this crap I kept hearing from people about "man it will heighten the orgasm man, you will freakin love it." -- so I tried a little experiment, which I ended up kinda liking. I didn't want to get into the whole "ok choke your partner" thing, so I decided to just try it on myself during sex to see how it worked out.

The first time I did this, I laid so that my feet were up where the pillows normally are, and my head was down by the bottom of the bed. My head was 1/2 way on the bed and half way off, so that it was still supported, but if I moved a little further down I could hang my head off the edge of the bed, upside down. When I knew it was not that far off, and the pressure started to build up, I slid just a little closer to the edge, and tilted my head back, off the edge of the bed, so my view was upside down. The two big veins in my neck, on either side of my windpipe, were affected by this - and it wasn't very long before I got that cool sensation, the one you get right before you pass out. Well, all I can say is that it worked (and still works) for me, and I got off very nicely; I'm not sure it was due as much to the actual physical results of almost passing out, or the excitement of doing something "semi dangerous" but, it does increase my excitement. 'course, its not necessary, and I find myself not doing it more often than not - but, its nice occasionally. heheh.

Ok, that was a freaky thing to share. I think I need to step away from the keyboard for awhile. heh.
-------
Ok, this is really scary. I just re-read my node after posting this, and realized I did not make something specifically clear: When I did this, I was not alone. It was not a game of uno.. or a game of solitare.. I was not the only naked person in the room. Thankfully, I was the only naked male in the room at the time; else I would have been asking my girlfriend some serious questions instead. heheh.

(thing) by renster (1.7 mon) (print) ? 3 C!s I like it! Thu Jul 06 2000 at 3:18:56

I wish *I* could stick my penis under a faucet to get an orgasm.

Oh.. hang on.. there's a small orifice here..what if I just.... Damn! It wont fit!

Maybe If I push harder

Ah Shit! IT's STUCK! FUCK!

HELP! DEAR GOD! THE PAIN!

..maybe if i turn the tap on....

(thing) by DoctorNo (5.2 y) (print) ? I like it! Sun Jan 07 2001 at 0:11:05

Although I didn't do this myself, it does belong here, because the person who did it was in quite a bad fix.

It happened at a motel in Florida a few years back and was the laughingstock of the media for a good week or so.

Late at night, a gentleman who was staying at the motel decided to go for a swim. He got a little frisky and stuck his wang in one of the water pipe holes on the side of the pool. As tumescence increased, his wang got lodged in the hole, much like what happens when dogs have sex. After frantic efforts to dislodge it, he finally started shouting for help.

Some time later, the fire department showed up on the scene and somehow managed to dislodge him. I'm not sure how they did it, but maybe they used graphite or applied positive pressure at the other end of the pipe.

printable version
chaos

How katyana nearly killed someone else masturbating	Tales from an ex fat chick	Bliss and the Art of Shower Massage Masturbation	When sex hurts (Men)
14-year-old girls	Give it the old college try	I will REMOVE your "All your radical touching base are already occurred to the lesbian monkey puppy" philosophy on me if you don't eat my soy google balls, hatt-baby. Real or malarky?	tumescence
Masturbation horror stories	Punch the monkey and win $20	Marquis de Sade	Stupid ways to hurt yourself
Asphyxiation	And that's why we don't have sex in the nose	I will REMOVE the fucking toilet seat if you don't shut up	How Pac-Man and Ms. Pac-Man have sex
double slit experiment	Steering wheel down your underpants	clit	The difference between fucking and making love
US Policy on the Comprehensive Test Ban Treaty	A cow with violent gas	XP Whore	Unclogging a bathtub

No more writeups are being accepted for this node. If you feel you have something to add to this node, post it on your Scratch Pad and contact an editor.

Login
Password

remember me
password reminder
register

Everything2 Help

Things you could have written:
The New Revised Guide To Internet Funni
Medieval European History
Cat bathing as a martial art
Convolvulaceae
Nessun dorma
Wild Hunt
Labrador retriever
Eyes Wide Shut
dual of a vector space
Bottom
HIV test
A Grandpa's Notebook
Earth

aneurin
British Monomarks	(idea)
FrankThomas
How and why do we (humans) have culture?	(essay)
lee_cad
Isaac	(person)
kalen
downvota	(poetry)
Andrew Aguecheek
Wstfgl	(thing)
ncc05
overheard at IHOP	(event)
calgon
Bottomless	(poetry)
lismaraxt
Ice Theory of The Origin of Life	(idea)
allthetime
Apple Cinnamon Suicide	(idea)
Lucy-S
shovelglove	(idea)
Adaptive Child
Mexican secret sauce	(recipe)
Adaptive Child
nacho libre	(recipe)
TheLady
Iron Man	(review)
Scaevola
Risk in the Roman law of sale	(idea)
semicolon
overheard at IHOP	(event)

This page courtesy of The Everything Development Company