Homeowner's Association

created by LordNathan

(thing) by LordNathan (1.1 y) (print) ? (I like it!) Tue Jul 31 2001 at 8:49:34

Homeowner's Associations (HOAs) are groups that are put together within a subdivision or housing development ostensibly to represent the homeowners and make sure that everyone is happy.

In reality, these organizations are much more heinous. Since normal people have better things to do than rule the minute details of people's lives, these organizations are populated with incredibly bored, incredibly anal people. These are the people who sit in their homes with cameras ready to take a picture of your dog taking a crap in order to nail you on a violation of the covenant, Clause 143, Paragraph 45, Section 14, Article 5, Chapter 11.

Then, they send out their smarmy newsletter every month or so with "helpful reminders" about what the covenant says on various subjects (usually dog poop). This is accompanied by messages like: "We are making good progress on the problem of dog waste, but there is still a long way to go." These newsletters give away the fact that the HOA is in fact filled with the people who were cheerleaders or student council members in high school. These newsletters only serve to remind you that when you bought your house and agreed to the covenant, you unwittingly sold them your soul.

These are the people who have taken a good idea too far. I can understand not wanting people to paint their houses in a rainbow color, or not wanting to have cars jacked up on cinderblocks in the front yard; but only allowing people 3 different shades of white to use on their home is ridiculous. And so is sending a warning to move a Bronco II (a working, unrusted one) parked in the street because it is an "eyesore." I think that those damned Lexus SUVs are an eyesore, but I have better things to do than complain every time I see one.

I am convinced that if a fascist government ever takes hold in the United States, it will have started in the Homeowner's Associations.

printable version
chaos

Yuppie nihilism	yuppie larvae	Penises have higher bandwidth than cable modems	peak oil and re-urbanization
Hoa	McMansion

Y'know, if you log in, you can write something here, or contact authors directly on the site. Create a New User if you don't already have an account.

Login
Password

remember me
password reminder
register

Everything2 Help

Look at this mess the Death Borg made!
Haven't Seen Barbados
Schumann resonance
The Life Of Jesus
hydrogen bond
E2 Hospitality Index
Sidekick
Guessing the worth of something
Risk
GTKY
Arrow's Impossibility Theorem
How not to beat Jet Li's kung-fu style in "Fist of Legend"
The Johnny Appleseed of LSD
list collector

antigravpussy
One fly amongst many	(person)
sam512
Moon Base Shackleton, 1978	(fiction)
Pavlovna
toy boy	(person)
XWiz
tear jerker	(review)
Heitah
Anarchy is Order	(idea)
jessicaj
July 26, 2008	(dream)
Berek
ABBA	(person)
devolution
k-hole	(place)
Nadine_2
The Sound Of Madness	(review)
SwimmingMonkey
Conversations with Fo Fo, the Loneliest dog in Purgatory	(fiction)
locke baron
lynx	(thing)
Simulacron3
Reality, Dimensions and the Natural Ontology	(essay)
SubSane
Making Love to a 9-Foot Woman	(person)
Ouzo
Thoughts	(idea)
antigravpussy
I fall silent, listening. The breadcrumbs are talking about us	(person)

Everything 2 is brought to you by the letter C and The Everything Development Company