Citizen Keen's New Writeups

Alien vs. Predator (thing)

2004-08-18T19:53:07Z

Finally brings to the big screen the conflict between the Aliens and the Predators (of Arnold Schwarzenegger fame), Alien versus Predator (or AVP) is the simple, barely sustaining summer schlock we've come to expect from Hollywood. Written and directed by Paul Anderson (of Mortal Kombat, Resident Evil and Event Horizon reknown), follows a plot that's so simple and so predictable that any enjoyment gained by watching Predators kill or Aliens eat is lost.

The movie stars Sanaa Lathan, who wishes she was Jada Pinkett Smith. A large number of small, B-movie actors you won't recognize populate the film, interspersed with extra-terrestrials in poorly choreographed fight scenes. The only actors you might recognize are Ewen Bremner, who played Mullet in Snatch, and Lance Henriksen, who's had a bit part in every movie since Steamboat Willie.

AVP has none of the thrilling excitement of the Predator movies and later Alien…

Alan Tudyk (person)

2004-08-17T23:12:00Z

Probably most famous for his role as Wash in the Fox television show Firefly, Alan Tudyk is seen by many as a rising star in Hollywood - if, by no means, a Johnny Depp, at least a recognizable celebrity.

While he had roles in Patch Adams and Wonderboys, Tudyk's first major role was the squire Wat Falhurst in the Heath Ledger vehicle A Knight's Tale. ("Pain. Lots of pain.")

Tudyk then went on to gain roles in Hearts in Atlantis and Ice Age. However, Tudyk then went on to get the role of the pilot Hoban Washburne in Joss Whedon's post-Buffy show, Firefly, a role he will reprise in the upcoming movie Serenity, slated for an April 2005 release.

With a firm fanbase in hand, Tudyk went on to star as Sonny in I, Robot alongside summer superstar Will Smith (and Smith himself referred to Tudyk as the true star of the movie). Tudyk also recently acted alongside Vince Vaugn and Ben Stiller in…

craigslist (place)

2004-08-17T22:01:58Z

Craigslist is an online host for classified ads that can be found at http://www.craigslist.org.

Craiglist works on a local level, with subdomains ranging from San Francisco and New York, from Austin to Boston, and of course, my hometown, Portland.

Classified ads can be placed for free, sorted by category, for everything from housing to jobs, furniture to sex. Subcategories help you find specifics on what you're looking for. The website also maintains a list of community events (such as The Pushovers performances and classes and so forth) and active discussion forums.

Yet the (arguably) most famous part of Craigslist is the Rants 'n' Raves (save for possibly the Casual Encounters section), a list of posting in which people can flip out and complain about whatever they want. While this may sound like a recipe for disaster, the Rants 'n' Raves section of Craigslist (along with the rest of the site) is policed by the community.…

Operation: Ninja Patriot (idea)

2003-03-07T06:59:28Z

So, it looks like we're really commited to redestroying Saddam. My friend in the Army is getting shipped off to Kuwait or some other God-forsaken country, and I started thinking about how we're going to destroy Saddam.

Now, given, we throw enough soldiers at Iraq, and eventually we'll kill him, like we killed Osama. But, troops aren't cool. Winning a war with the world's most powerful military force won't help - we'll just end up pissing off a lot more bitter foreigners, and they'll keep terrorizing us. If we're going to do this, we have to impress people. We have to do it right, we have to be cool. Soldiers may win this battle, but they won't win this war. To win this war, we need ninjas and Camaros and other elements of coolness, to win over all those neanderthals who aren't American.

In order to do this, I present to you...

Operation: Ninja Patriot

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Milk stool business analogy (idea)

2003-03-06T20:53:26Z

This is an analogy I learned from one of the best businessmen I've ever met. It has been used at a lot of the business structuring seminars I've been to.

A business is like a milk stool. It has three legs. The owners, the customers, and the employees. If any of the legs gets too long or too short, then the stool falls over.

If you give too much to the owners (running your business for stock and dividends), or to the customers (coupons and specials), or to the employees (yes, some businesses give too much to their employees, in the form of wages that are too high or the hours being too flexible), then the stool falls over. This is important because a lot of businesses forget their employees. Look at the really successful businesses - Nike and Microsoft, for example. Nike has all kinds of facilities that are there just for the employees, and Microsoft gives its…

Son-Jara (thing)

2003-03-06T11:19:45Z

Son-Jara is both the main character and the name of an epic tale. It's kind of one of those The Odyssey/Odysseus things. For anybody striving to break the bonds of literary eurocentrism, this is a tale that deserves to be placed next to The Odyssey and the Iliad.

Unlike many works of literature, the tale of Son-Jara has no definitive version or author. For the purposes of this writeup, I will be using D. T. Niane's Sundiata: An Epic of Old Mali and Fa-Digi Sosoko's The Epic of Son-Jara. However, Penguin Classic's Bamba Suso and Banna Kanute | Sunjata contains two other variant tellings that are also very good.

Son-Jara is an oral tale. Like The Odyssey and the Iliad, and unlike the similar tale The Aeneid, Son-Jara was spoken for generations in the African continent before every being written down. Niane's text is a literary translation: it is written down in prose by…